Mai pen rai

I could do this...

2011-10-28T21:05:00.001-07:00

Friday night: home alone. revising a paper. I could do this. This could be my life.

Readers, you already know my deep affection for teaching from my Thai posts. I only love it more now that my students understand the words that I am saying. at least--the majority of the time.

But, I really like graduate school. Sure. I am stressed. and sometimes, I think it really does seem a little pointless to write long papers about obscure literary topics. But, there are two really great things about that--

1) It helps inform me when I teach. Through some poorly managed class discussions, I have learned that writing is a necessary component for being able to speak intelligently about a subject.

2) Occasionally, it does matter. I care about my paper I wrote about how sexuality is portrayed in young adult literature. and I care about gender constructs in southern literature.

So, I'm applying to PhD programs. a few. and if I am unsuccessful, a lot of me still desperately wants to teach in another country a little more. I just don't know if that's me avoiding real life. or if that is real life. but adventure, in country or out of country could await...

Also, in case you are concerned that I only see adventure in the future--I did go to a 'Pumplefest' tonight. an English department event of pumpkins and apples. You'd think as English majors--we'd use our wordsmithiness to create something better than pumplefest. or wordsmithiness for that matter.

Freshman English Instructor

2011-10-05T15:40:00.000-07:00

Today in class I tried to have a conversation with my students about the importance of literature.

I love teaching. I don't know if it is because my narcicisstic personality loves having a 'captive' audience or if it's my life calling. I'm not sure at this point that I really care to know the answer. For now, I like what I do. an obnoxious amount.

I went to two seminars in the past couple of weeks. One was to learn about blogging where I told the group that I didn't blog any more. But, upon saying that, I felt a little sad. Also, I love teaching to an obnoxious amount which causes me to talk about it entirely too much. So I thought I would blog again. You are not being forced to read about my teaching so I don't have to feel guilty.

The second seminar was ambiguously titled "The Ten Year Question". The fascinating presenter, Dr. Ed Burger, stated that, by virtue of us being in graduate school, we naturally think about things in a different way than our students. And, our job as educators is to teach students a new method of thinking. So, in ten years, what will they remember from our class? Maybe not how important topic sentences are...but rather, how to approach something they read and accurately assess its meaning and how to agree or to disagree with it...that's a valuable skill.

End of summer.

2011-08-13T07:35:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile, blogging world. I finished my first year of grad school, took my first ever summer school class, and am about to start training for teaching freshman english in the fall. so today is one of my last days to sleep in...but I think the rain made me wake up. So, I made some coffee, opened the windows, and listened to the weepies. what a great morning. I may have also danced around with Dinah.

Who is Dinah? well, she's my roommate's cat. but as my roommate has been out of town for a month--we've become very attached. now I do really like my roommate, but I am a little sad she's about to come back and steal Dinah away from me. I like that Dinah follows me around the apartment, and tries to fall asleep on me at every possible moment. she's very sweet. but not too camera friendly. here are some photos to give you an idea of how I spent my summer. I happen to LOVE living alone...I think because no one has to know how often I throw dance parties to TSwift. or listen to the same song on repeat all morning or how often I burn my food.

I didn't mean to look so pensive. I think I was trying to coax her to look at the camera. but she closed her eyes and purred. she is constantly trying to take a nap.

and again, I am saying smile, and she's barely opening her eyes. my fave thing is when she decides in the middle of walking across the room that she's tired and she flops her entire body down on the ground. I also got my haircut, but you can't really tell from these photos. I'm trying to look older and more professional. here's to professoring soon!

-CD

HP

2011-02-16T08:30:00.000-08:00

I just bought a new computer--an HP--and I feel reasonably sure that they are trying to make their cover look like Harry Potter. which is only their greatest plan ever. I heart HP. the boy, the books, the movies, and the computer.

In other news, I just recently returned from a conference in New Orleans. I presented a paper--on a book that apparently no one had actually read, but this is just not surprising as my first foray into academia. there's just too much out there, and too many people trying to further the conversation. so who cares if I present and write about an obscure topic in a little known work--well at least it's original--well enough of my rant.

I did get positive feedback on my presenting capabilities--at least I think it was positive--the chair of my session said I seemed quite confident and enjoying myself...he may have been referring to the fact that I tried to mimic character's voices in my paper--apparently, that's not common in the literary world--but let's spice things up a bit.

Speaking of spice, I loved the food in New Orleans and the traveling aspect. maybe more than the conference...hmmm...

Thinking of my next traveling possibilities...

-CD

polls.

2011-01-07T19:08:00.000-08:00

I recently polled the facebook world--now I shall pose my queries to the blogging world.

(1) Do we like jeggings?
In case you were reticent to comment on my status--you can voice your opinion here. My sitemeter said only three people were reading the blog--so your secret's safe with me.

(2)How do you feel about the recent Ryan Reynolds/Scarlett Johannson break up? Is it a shame they are not procreating and clearly elevating the attractiveness level of the human species? Or is it better to break up those genetic powerhouses?

(3)Has anyone seen the mockumentary I'm still here? Joaquin Pheonix is a nut and it is offensive. But was it really a hoax? Is there anything to it? Does it say anything about celebrity?

(4) What should I name my blog? currently, it may lead one to believe that I still live in a foreign country. and I do not. although rick perry may wish it so.

Awaiting your answers,
CD

Happy New Year's!

2011-01-01T14:20:00.000-08:00

Ringing in the New Year with the same people since I was 14--(I think we missed a couple-but for the most part)

To 2011--may there be an adventure!

2010-11-14T20:35:00.000-08:00

Lindsey and I after the Baylor game

Halloween--EMO PRINCESS. with Jenna as Lucy

return--briefly.

2010-10-19T20:33:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile. apologies. here are some current thoughts:

-I want a kitten.

-I'm reading my first ever graphic novel...for class.

-I went to see my sister in Ithaca. law school kids seemed less pretentious than english grad students as a whole. probably because they know one day they will be respected and have money so there's no need to validate themselves...clearly not the case for us english kids.

-I saw Niagara falls and Canada. while on maid of the mist--I met someone from Burma. I had to make friends since Leah and Andrew didn't go on the boat with me. something about me needing to be independent. hmm.

-I want the Bears to be bowl eligible. I will be in Austin training to teach the GMAT. and will miss all homecoming festivities.

-I miss Thailand every single day.

-Last year at this time I was in Vietnam. mmm pho.

-If shoes tied by shoelaces strung over electric wires means that there is a drug outfit there--why don't people bust it? is that invasion of privacy? is this just an urban myth? I've wondered this for so long...

2010-08-17T08:39:00.000-07:00

I am moved into my new apartment--and it has a great shower. However, I tried to take a bath recently. and discovered that it is a very narrow bathtub. immediately I thought--I must work out. but right on the heels of that thought was a very sad moment where I thought about William Howard Taft. If you know about him--you might know that he was once the President, but also you might know he once got stuck in his bathtub. and people do remember that. and I just felt bad for him--that that was his legacy. and that was my bath time pondering--which now that I write this--feels kinda weird. here's a better thought to end on...

"For those who confess the Lamb that was slain as risen Lord worthy to receive power, there can be no ultimate need to choose between suffering love and social effectiveness." John Howard Yoder from Nonviolence A Brief History The Warsaw Lectures

Off to Jillian Michael's workout and English grad school orientation....

2010-07-12T18:51:00.000-07:00

I've been feeling a bit on the blah side lately--I sift through paper for my job currently. and things were becoming lackluster.

however, I recently got an assignment for graduate school--and I feel energized again. (of course this is before I actually have to do real school work--and it's all in theory, but still I'll cling to that excitement about being a student again).

and to explain how I feel about literature--

I was reading something from Oswald Chambers the other day and this phrase struck me, "Men and women have no business to be innocent; God demands that they be pure and virtuous." and I was confused--because isn't innocence and purity the same thing? but then I recalled a character from Dickens' Bleak House...the character is Harold Skimpole--he's always described as childlike and innocent..and yet he has no business being innocent as he impinges on other's goodwill. His innocence is spawned from ignorance rather than an active pursuit of turning away from evil.

Dickens' character clarified a truth. and that is awesome. as is Oswald Chambers.

Molly and David are married!

2010-06-28T15:27:00.000-07:00

This last Saturday--Molly and David got married. I've been looking forward to this for a really long time. I thought about it a lot in Thailand--b/c I knew I would get to spend time with a lot of my good friends for their wedding. and I was pretty much David and Molly's permanent third-wheel all through senior year, which sounds kind of disconcerting. and if you've followed my blog you know that I am always a third wheel with my family. but it's really not bad with Molly and David. and that's why I am so excited about their marriage. Both of them had a huge impact in my life during senior year when I had no clue what was next. and I am just really excited to see the impact that their little married selves will have on others.

and it was really good to see old friends--that I hadn't really seen much since Thailand. I have seven more weeks of archiving...and then I'm on to my next adventure.

God is so good at orchestrating life events--just how I ended up best friends with molly and roommates with melissa and then just all of us being friends from there-- sort of like how I ended up going to maastricht a semester later than I thought I would...how I didn't get Teach for America and ended up in Thailand. so of course I can wait and trust that Baylor is right for me this fall. God is good, and I am blessed.

not inspired.

2010-06-17T10:36:00.000-07:00

I don't feel inspired to write-- but I'm on my lunch break from work, and feel that if I don't write now, I may stop altogether...sorta like with reading... I've just stopped... because my mind is tired. I'm busy, finally. and glad--b/c I need to work. but really...I just stare at papers all day (8-5--I LIVE for my lunch break!) and try to organize them in some logical manner. (I'm an archives' assistant at the library-this summer). If you know me, you will know that I am NOT a good organizer. I'm a mess and now I have to sort other people's messes. their random scraps of paper that find their way in collections of receipts and letters.

but I'm trying to learn things.

the other day I learned Baylor had a Bride's School. Yep, if you thought you needed some help preparing for your wedding they had a little course-type thing. I thought it was pretty funny. and weddings are on my mind! molly is getting married in 9 days. Holla!

-CD

My hometown is Waco, Texas.

2010-05-27T16:43:00.000-07:00

I know, I know. I finally admit it. I've always clung to the idea that I was from my first hometown--Atlanta, Georgia, (specifically College Park--shoutout to Ludacris, holla! wait, did I ever tell you, that one day during tutoring I realized that Christina was saying holla. I felt so proud.) Moving on, I liked Georgia for my first seven years--and we had a really strong community of family and friends there. It's hard to imagine but at seven years old--I was very sad and lonely when we moved to Texas. thank goodness for my cat ziggy! (I think I shall have a memorial blog for her soon.) When I started at Baylor--I felt that it was boring to admit I was from Waco and yet knew no one from Waco because I had gone to a very small high school. But, I was wrong. that was hard to say. maybe not wrong--just slightly mislead.

I started my 8-5 library job this week, and have had the pleasure of spending 8 hours a day in a cold, secluded office going through files, newspapers, cutting, copying, and organizing. not necessarily my strong suits. but the upside of it is--I found some very interesting archives about Waco, and it truly has a rich history. At one point, it was referred to as, "Athens on the Brazos". I find that a bit much, but I'll take it. and mostly all my family is from this area--so I'm trying to put together some family history--so as not to go crazy this summer. it's hard work--the not going crazy.

I forgot about my reading quest blog-whoops. but I am reading Jude the Obscure--and I don't love it. However, I do want to write a book called Christy the Obvious--that is blunt and doesn't try to "MEAN" anything. It is such a shame when people try to mean something with everything--

for example, elizabethtown--she's supposed to be all different and interesting, but she's not. and it's a fail. on the other hand, you have things that make their point. but then just keep drilling it--like The Alchemist. I get it. already. there's your own path--go follow it. and leave me alone. and Glee. I love Glee. but seriously, I get that we're all different and should love the geeks. I was a geek. I am a geek. can you stop drilling it every week? make your point and move on. speaking of- I think I've made mine. and probably ticked people off--good. that's what the obvious does.

mmm, this post is too long and my sister's pup is whining--how come when she needs love and affection she can just whine. but if I do that--I'm an attention whore? if you made it to the end of this, I'm sorry. but I'm alone. all day. and I need to talk. or whine. we're basically like puppies.

2010-05-08T21:08:00.000-07:00

My readership is waning. but then again my social life is waning. I have eaten the last two dinners at restaurants, alone. but you see, I'm in Austin on job training. and am the only one from Waco. so I've spent a lot of this weekend alone in my hotel. being a very sophisticated adult on a business trip. so I did what all mature people do--I jammed out to Miley Cyrus and jumped from bed to bed. then I felt a little ridiculous, so I channeled my inner Bridget Jones and sang "All by Myself" loudly. now, you are probably concerned with my neighbors--but don't worry, I realized that they are all highschool band kids as I got swept up in the midst of them. and one of them tried to talk to me, and then he and all his friends laughed, and he was like, Oh I thought she was one of us. ahem, no, child. I'm not fifteen and I don't play the tuba. I'm a mature 22-yr. old business woman. as I stalked off to blog about my emotions. that's not highschoolish at all. but I did eat by myself at a bar at a restaurant, of course even being in another city, I knew one of the waiters. oh ninfas. oh but I have a new summer job. archiving at the library. that'll for sure afford me lots of entertaining stories for yall.

peace out A-town.

quests.

2010-04-26T06:23:00.000-07:00

So this blog has always had a bit of a journey-type mentality since I started it when I went to Europe--and then senior year was the thesis journey--then thailand--now grad school. but wait, before I get there--I have the summer. so it shall be a bit of a reading journey--or quest.

I have just been really unsatisfied with chick-flicks lately. what is happening? I need to see some good movies--help.

As far as books go--I love coming-of-age stories. maybe because they clarify what you felt like when you were a child. I've often wondered why no one can explain how you feel so alone and different when you were starting to grow-up and yet in a few years you read about it, and it makes perfect sense, and everyone was feeling the same way.

When I've been upset about things--I like to write. In high school I wrote angsty poems. sometimes in the middle of class--embarrassing.

but since then--everything I write--is just not cathartic, b/c after I write it and I read it--it sounds so prosaic. so how are all these authors poignantly portraying these kids' exact same feelings? as my 2nd cousin said, "I lost all my words." that is how I feel about writing. better yet, I can use A tree grows in Brooklyn to explain it, "She read the words over aloud. They sounded like words that came in a can; the freshness was cooked out of them." That is exactly how I feel when I re-read what I write. stale. so I'm on a quest to read what I feel--or something like that.

3 weeks.

2010-04-23T09:26:00.001-07:00

I've been home for three weeks--here are some highlights. nothing's too exciting, but it's hard to compare to ya know, thailand.
--so after I came home from DFW for a couple of days--I went to a sandcastle fest in Port Aransas. legit. There were all these people using little watersprayers and chisels to create masterpieces.

--then Seavey came to Texas--and that was awesome! we went to Houston and I saw Melissa! we picked strawberries and watched miley cyrus in The Last Song. I am not a nicholas sparks fan, but I always go...what does that mean?

--I got to see tiller and lynn and say goodbye--I felt like saying goodbye was kind of like the end of an era. my thai era--now on to grad school.

--I've registered, I am starting training to teach GRE classes as extra income in the fall. and currently still looking for a more permanent summer job and a car.

--oh and last night I got to see Colbie!

-CD

Home.

2010-04-06T16:43:00.000-07:00

Beautiful little cove in Koh Phi Phi! I spent a gorgeous week at the beaches in the South of Thailand. It was glorious. I went snorkeling 4 times, kayaked, and had 3 massages. I was sad to leave--but then--I had a wonderful return!

Molly has an excellent blog about my homecoming. It was wonderful and her family is great. I really do think we should re-instate clans. I would create a wonderful clan with all kindred spirits. maybe I spent too much time admiring the hippie communes. that's alright--I like my idealism.

and I like America. at first, I was angry. I had to run across the San Francisco airport to catch my flight. I was almost in tears because I thought I was going to miss my last leg of my trip--and I knew I had too good of a homecoming with Molly and Alyssa and David to miss. and no one was helpful--so all through security I was muttering about hating America--but then I realized that was probably a horrible decision. so I shut my mouth. which I should probably do more often.

but then I came home. and it was good.

and then I came home to Waco--and saw my parents! and my dad gave me a baylor sweatshirt--b/c here's the news--I'm going to Baylor graduate school in the fall! God really blessed me with this opportunity. and I am excited to get my master's. so I should start enjoying this long summer. it's really the first time I've been unemployed in 5 years--so I need to work on that. but for now--more photos are showing up on fbook!

and yes, dear readers, I will continue my blog. thank you to all of you--who care about me to listen to my ramblings. its good to be home. but I hope to continue some asian-ness in my life!

-CD

2010-03-31T20:19:00.000-07:00

"... just don't know what to do with myself." oh boy. too many emotions. shutup, brain, shutup.

I am boarding a plane in less than twelve hours. my heart is alternately breaking and leaping.

I think I'll go have a street coffee. try and sell my phone back--and try hard not to think about the finality of moving. I still remember moving from Georgia. I held captain cook and waved out the back of the van. and I had no idea that I would be so sad to go. Now, I know, I'm sad. But, don't get me wrong, I am so pumped to see you all.

I will just miss my students, my teachers, my coworkers, and the crazy streets. I didn't really think about how this would feel ten months ago when I came here. I never even thought about the fact that I would be a teacher. and now that's the thing I'll miss the most. but enough reflecting. there's something next that will be awesome.

I can't really be sad, when I'm so blessed to have been so happy over here.

sa-wa-dee-ka,
ajarn christy

two weeks. woe.

2010-03-20T00:38:00.000-07:00

Christina and I at our last tutoring session. tears were shed. by me. I heart her a lot.

In two weeks' time, I will be arriving in DFW. weirdo. I don't know if Ill have much internet time before then. so this might be my last post in the land of BKK. hope not.

I am very sad to leave because it feels so final. and changes always make me ponder a little too much. so instead of doing that...I shall tell you what I am excited about. (I mean other than my friends and family!)

1) washer and DRYER.
2) fast internet
3) aircon
4) no traffic (although I shall miss public transportation oh so much. but I am not allowing myself to think about that)
5) peanut butter
6) cheese
7) all things Mexican.

Im pumped. I love yall.

yesterday, I curtseyed in front of the Princess. bam. my life is weird. Im off to the beach with the school and then to the SOUTH. yep.
-CD

burn baby burn.

2010-03-12T19:14:00.000-08:00

I forgot to mention in my last post that one of the reasons Pai was so dry was that they still practice slash and burn techniques. I never thought that I would actually see that since it was always mentioned in history books. But on our trek back I walked past smoldering flames. and it was such a mystery about how it all works. I mean, I know it's bad, but how do they control it? it was FASCINATING and I really think there should be a documentary about it.

Oh and did I mention that there were so many daddy long legs on our trip that you could HEAR them walking. bizarro.

waiting out the protests,
CD

P.S. This is how I normally spend my time at the beach. Oh that Asian sun. so ya know the sun rises here not sets.. and it rises with a vengeance. bryan, note what I quoted?

home.

2010-03-10T22:42:00.000-08:00

I just got home from Chang Mai and Pai. Chang Mai is in the North of Thailand--and we didn't spend much time there...just saw a really old temple from 1296. which really isn't that long after the magna carta..and ya know do you ever think about asia and how they were doing while the europeans were all strugglin' with the whole feudal system. how are you ever supposed to get it all in focus?

then we headed up to pai--which is like a back-packer, hippie haven. and I liked it. it was vair vair peaceful. It was a little dry and not a lot going on. The river which is quite the attraction was a little on the murky side and there were no rapids for the tubing. so we chilled. and ate mexican food. a lot. this nice man (a little too chatty) from South Texas had just opened a Mexican food restaurant. so we ate there--every night. it was a delight. but now that Im so near the end I think I shall hold out till the states. weird. I still can't process that Ill be in home in three weeks.

then on our last day in pai we rode bikes up to a creek and then hiked along the creek up three miles to a waterfall. then I scaled the rock up to the first pool of water and climbed underneath the pelting water. it was awesome. I was scared of parasites/anything that could happen since we were in the middle of nowhere. with almost no one around. but it was still a thrill.

oh and I rode on the back of a motorbike for a bit. It was fun. I was scared but very careful, parents.

I took an overnight train back into BKK this morning (non-ac, but it was okay!) and I was supposed to have school tomorrow--but because of the protests we don't have to go. basically, the redshirts (a political party that supports the ousted prime minister) are trying to march from the chitralada palace school to the grand palace with like a million people. interesting. but should be okay. one more week of school...then beach time.

-peace out.
CD

Quick Update--

2010-03-05T01:10:00.000-08:00

In four weeks--I will be landing in DFW. weird. weird. weird.

Last weekend I went to Koh Chang--it was junglely and beachy. and my scalp is peeling.

I finally finished all my work projects on Thursday. So today I'm taking an overnight train up North until Thursday. Then I come to school for Friday for miscellaneous stuff--then the next week I will be doing graduation rehearsals, which include me learning how to curtsy. my life is bizarre. I wish I could explain even more...

Then, I'm going to the beach with the graduating seniors for a couple days then down south. where I will tan to perfection and return to america a bronzed beauty. with my whole scalp intact. or so I hope. the sun is intense. I am on a regimented tanning project so that I can actually enjoy the beach instead of hiding in the shade.

Bangkok Malls.

2010-02-21T03:46:00.000-08:00

Siam Paragon--ritzy mall where I spend a lot of time.

random fake sunflowers

chinese lantern walk

This weekend I decided not to go to the beach for budgeting issues/ my skin is dreadfully pale and I just didn't feel up to it. so instead I spent my weekend at the malls in bangkok as per usual. I spend a lot of time here because they are pretty, my gym is located in one, and they are relatively close to my apt.

Yesterday there was a large exhibit in Siam with all sorts of things for sale from the King's projects...he sponsors a lot of tribes in the north. and right outside was this massive sunflower bed right next to all the chinese lanterns! its really fun.

Then today after church I went to Emporium the other really nice mall, and had a legit hamburger! (Dad, I can't wait for Dubl-R). and right in the middle of Emporium they were having like a music festival--so asians singing, "I love rock and roll" and "One way or another...Im gonna getcha getcha getcha" was a delightful moment. I love all the random stuff.

and to finish off, the other day in tutoring my ten-yr.old, whom I formerly thought was five, I decided to teach the word smile. I make faces to elicit words like nervous, excited, etc. so I smiled really big and said, "petch, what's this?" and all he said was "scaaaarrry." hahahaha--somehow my scared face and happy face are the same. I laughed for a full minute and decided to bring out pictures next time.
Here is Petch and I--I was trying to make him show off his dimples!

saying bye to my kids.

2010-02-19T03:15:00.000-08:00

So this week was my last week of teaching. and I am sad. I was supposed to finish teaching today, but on Monday morning they told me that Wednesday was the last day teaching. We are rearranging our entire finals schedule because of possible protests next week. interesting. mostly this means that I didn't get to say goodbye to M.1, which is probably good since I almost cried in one of my classes. and M.1 is very close (ok pretty much for sure) my favorites. They are so cute. I'll post more photos soon. This is me and my M.4 English main. I almost cried--they did not.

Anyway now I just have finals, grades, and waiting. waiting for graduation, waiting if they let me leave school to travel, and waiting on grad applications. mmm this sounds delightful. but at least Ill get so fed up with it--Ill be ready for Texas.

I got a cavity filled today at our school clinic. no numbing. and she insisted I use the mirror to look at my teeth. which was kinda fun. but then she put a mask over my face and started poking around and making thai exclamations such as, "oy" and "yao", that was a bit disconcerting.

-CD

double doozy.

2010-02-13T03:06:00.000-08:00

Two precious M4 girls and me!

So this weekend it's both valentine's day and chinese new year on Sunday--which means bkk is festively decorated with lovely chinese lanterns and hanging roses. they go all out. and it's super fun. I've always loved Valentine's day--except for freshman year when I tried to wear all black, but then I got a singing telegram from my parents at school so I quickly re-donned my hot pink overshirt. I was super cool. so I forgot what a big deal v-day is in highschool all the kids had made heart stickers and were putting them on each other. it was quite fun.

and then I went to my M5 class and was given a vday card. I was super pumped, and I forgot that in Asian culture--you aren't supposed to open gifts in front of people. so I opened my card. and immediately regretted my decision. I found out a couple hours later that the whole thing had been orchestrated chiefly by Geoffrey but the boys were all too willing to go along. I received a Valentine's day card that was highly inappropriate. I actually cannot divulge the full contents of the card. but each boy had written inside the card things like, "to the cutest teacher" "my passion flower" "sexy thing from usa" I was MORTIFIED. I quickly put the card away and said, "uh yall are ridiculous. thanks for my card, I think. and today we are learning gerunds."

I was really afraid that I was going to have to get the boys in trouble, but apparently once again--thai culture confuses me. everyone thought it was hysterical and even the 60yr.old principal liked it. I should've known--seeing that "nobody but you" was performed by teachers and students for her birthday. thai culture. so strange. and so fun.

I received this card a day after my dear m5 student had declared, "tea-cher, he wants to look like you" "what?" "he can be you" "oooohhhh, so an impression?" and then the student opened his eyes as wide as possible with the creepiest smile and gritted his teeth so that he could "get red" like me. oh gee students. lets make more fun of the farang.

celebrating valentine's tonight with the girls and chinese new year's eve!

sexy thing from usa,
CD

ant bites.

2010-02-02T07:31:00.000-08:00

Gaysorn and I eating Indian food the Friday before my birthday--I am really going to miss all the international food. I should probably eat more Thai food--its cheap, but sometimes I get enough at school. except for sum tum. mmmm!

apparently--I have one ant in my room, that bites me approximately once a night. and then it swells like to the size of nickel/quarter with a whitehead in the middle--and then scars. my legs are hideous. and I am sad. this has just started in the past couple weeks...and it sucks. although it does make me excited to go home to a real house.

on a more positive note, I got to interview kids today for an Australian exchange program. and I learned that Thai people don't like the Australian accent--interesting. and it was really nice to be on the other side of the table.

grad school apps are in--I feel strangely calm this year. last year at this time I was verging on a crisis...ahh the future. my future. so important. but in actuality--not so much. I could just go on teaching. esl. hmmm. meanwhile,

"I'm waiting on you Lord and I am hopeful...I will serve you while Im waiting..." john waller--thanks for the cd, faith! so encouraging!

-CD

yee-sip-song!

2010-01-29T23:36:00.001-08:00

that's 22 in Thai--yep, 22. I am pretty excited actually. Every year since I turned fourteen I have had the urge to cry on my birthday and not just b/c I can if I want to. but because growing up is just such a pain. maybe this is because of yks (you think so matt?) anyway, people have been telling me that there are really no good bdays after 21, but I beg to differ, its much less pressure to turn 22. I just feel like it's going to be a good year. whatever it brings. I did not feel like crying.

every year I tell myself that I will be more subtle about my birthday and not such an attention monger. and every year it is a massive fail. Geoffrey insisted on telling everyone. which meant that the accounting office gave me tiny little presents. for some reason thai people ADORE tiny little trinkets, just like their tiny little selves. I am now the proud owner of some fake miniature cupcakes and miscellaneous food items. and a display plate of the king.

hurray for Thailand. and my students singing to me. they are so cute. they thought I was turning 21, 20, 19, 27, 32. it was a wide range. when they sang to me I turned bright red. luckily I used that moment to teach the words blush and embarrassment.

22 in thailand,
CD

Why I love Thailand...

2010-01-22T06:47:00.000-08:00

aren't these girls cute? this was in China--one of the girls tried to give me all her popcorn.
We have been having quite delightful weather in Bangkok. I was actually chilly walking the other day--which has led me to have a euphoric sense of my life. so I thought I'd share:

Yesterday, in class my 11th graders were all crowding around a phone watching a video (I let them have 15minutes of free time after 1.5 solid hours of teaching the passive verb--I kept constantly cheering about the passive verb during the lesson--but even I was sick of it.) I immediately assumed they were watching a bad video, so I (being super nosy) moseyed on over to their table and asked to see it...and it was in ENGLISH. I cheered again...(I like anything that remotely encourages English!) anyway it was an apple and an orange talking to each other. that's all it was...and apparently that is the height of comedy. now I don't feel so bad when they don't like my jokes. I had tried to sing "Istanbul was Constantinople" earlier that day...and it was a dismal failure. Now the students quote the video ALL the time--but it's English so I laugh encouragingly.

Next, I taught my baby 7th graders. ahhh some of my post got deleted. to sum up--7thgraders said I looked like Gisele from Enchanted. I swooned on hearing this and said I wished I had a prince. this went over well. then we played battleship (past simple tense style! woo!)

then tutoring--much talking about hannah montana.

then yoga-I like it because I really miss lying on the floor with carpet..

then saxophone pub for live jazz and the cutest singer singing michael buble and sinatra...and my friend sang! yay bangkok!

-CD

booked a ticket.

2010-01-18T06:21:00.000-08:00

that's right, pending confirmation of credit card info--I have booked a ticket home! yay! Ill be back in the land of mexican food in time for Easter.

today in class I sang "Secret Agent Man" while teaching the word agent. then I sang "just another ordinary...(I actually don't know the words to this song...but I was teaching the word ordinary). being tone deaf is really unfortunate when given a mic. and yes, this is a self-indulgent post about what I do on a daily basis. you should really read my friend Lauren's blog--she really conveys the strangeness of our lives very well. her blog is www.thepurpleness.blogspot.com
I somehow forget that my life isn't normal and that bangkok isn't the only way of life. and there are just weird things that happen.

there really isn't that much to say. I had a fab day teaching. m.1 is the most precious group of human kids ever. and yes, I am letting you know that. I am a little sensitive right now. someone just told me they would NEVER date a girl with a blog. apparently he thinks my generation Y is too self-important. well, I think its too self-important to rule someone out for having a blog. who does he think he is. generation x. bah. and I can say that, b/c my brother who thinks he's in generation x--(being born in 1980-- missed it buddy). anyway he never reads this. maybe Ill say something everyday till he does. sorta like dave letterman and oprah. yes, yes, I did compare myself with dave. he's a delight--minus, his, um, ya know...shortcomings.

feeling self-indulgent and happy in bangkok,
CD

100th Blog!

2010-01-13T05:05:00.000-08:00

When I was in Vietnam at a museum--I decided to approach a group of school-age, non-English speaking kids and tried to use the stilts. it was a massive fail. but fun.

Since I kinda skipped the whole New Year's Blog thing--I thought I'd make this one about the old year/new year thing. I guess it's fairly typical that I would center this around MY blog instead of ya know the whole calendar year thing...hmmm....

New year--Im pumped. I LOVED last year. I tend to get kinda melancholy around December and listen to "A Long December" by the counting crows...and I sing the line, "maybe next year will be better than the last"...but I didnt really feel that way this year. I like my job. for example, on monday and tuesday there were no classes and we had carnaval type things. my kids all danced around in the courtyard while my m.5 students performed. my kids are super talented--they jammed out to taylor swift. It was awesome...they were like mosh pitting it up--once again I am confounded by the thai logic, but mai pen lai, it was fun. We went around to different booths buying things--so thai--to have a carnaval with food and shopping. the two faves apparently. the food was good though--it makes me sad that our school food is such a disappointment and it turns me off from thai food. I am starting to freak out about leaving here before Ive done everything!

oh so props to Lindsey and Faith for sending me my first mail (excluding the parents)! and in case anyone was wondering there is still time to send me a card in time for my bday. just a thought.

-CD

another highpoint/lowpoint

2010-01-11T07:19:00.000-08:00

Simone and I before hitting up the river.

went to Laos for new years--tubing, caving, it was good.

lost one of my contacts.

made the switch to soft contacts! I no longer look like a druggie. don't even think I am exaggerating. at ninfa's the kitchen workers all said I was the biggest druggie--although that may have something to do with my horrendous spanish.

It's been so long...

2010-01-10T02:08:00.000-08:00

On Christmas night we all went to eat. and then we tried to mimic the statues. as per usual.

Dear Blogging World,

I no longer have internet in my apartment, and I miss you. and I am sorry for the delay in writing...too much to say. so here's some little notes--some good, some bad.

- I was on TV in Thailand. Yep, I was visiting the King's hospital to sign a "get well" thing with the baylor group that came and visited. and they put us on the royal news that night. (every night there is a thirty minute segment about the royal family) its kinda cool.

-I had bbq with Professor Kay Mueller-love that woman. and talked to all the baylor students who were on the Thailand trip.

-Have I mentioned that since becoming a Baylor alum--we are all really school-spirited. we did a sic'em at outback on Christmas and there just happened to be other Baylor people. legit. (did I already tell you this? I am so confused--with what I write or send to people.)

-application process should be done this week. so cheers to baylor and tcu--may the best man win. or in this case, will one of you take me? [I was just re-reading this and I realized that if you didn't see the part about baylor and tcu--it would look like I was pleading with any man to take me--that is not the case. just so ya know]

-My cat of 14.5 years died. It is sad. I got her right after I moved to Texas and she really helped me when I moved to Texas. but she had a good life. I wish I could have been there at home, but its maybe better this way.

-Right now there is an awesome lego city exhibition in the mall where I am getting internet. (bangkok is so cool and exciting.)

-I taught the words "preppy" and "fratty" to my 11th graders since our chapter is "consumerism"(about shopping). I also tried to explain why consumerism and materialism are negative words. they really only wanted to see the pictures I brought of fratty boys. but hey at least I tried. I like them lots. and all my students. well, almost.

brilliance.

2009-12-27T23:47:00.000-08:00

two examples of the brilliance that inhabits my body.

1- I am not a kid person--people know this. J'adore my students, but that is it. Anyway, I thought that the precious boy I was tutoring was five. and I suddenly thought perhaps I was becoming a kid person because he seemed so apt and literally followed every move I made (this is typical with the language barrier and all). Anyway after two weeks of me thinking that perhaps I did want kids since by the time they were five they were like real people, I made a discovery. week two--I thought to myself this kid sure is tall. So I re-asked the question "how old are you?" "fine". "what? five". "yes, fine." ohhhhhhh epiphany. the child thinks I am asking him "how are you"...after some more writing of questions and pointing to numbers--it is established: the kid is nine and I am not a kid person.

2- I LOVE the free bus --every time I ride it no matter what I just think about the glories of public transportation. I just LOVE any form of public transformation--I don't know why. even if the bus is hot and crowded (no air con) and Im the only white person...I smugly nod my head...and just think: FREE. its a delight. on Saturday night I was eager to enjoy this delight...unfortunately you have to wait a bit for the free buses and as I was walking down my soi I saw it pass my stop--and in a moment of overconfidence in my athleticism I ran after it. I am not fast. and the bus was not in as much traffic as I thought. I continued to run. I thought oh this is fun--this will be my exercise--minutes later I hit the pavement and scraped up my leg and twisted my ankle. but I got up and thought I'd walk it off which I did for the next twenty minutes...then during the movie (I really enjoyed sherlock) it started aching and then I had to ice it...its okay now. slightly brusied--less than my pride for sure.

violence?

2009-12-22T02:19:00.000-08:00

happiness...

so this week I am house-sitting for suzie...which means I got to take a bath for the first time in 7 months--is that more info than you cared to know? too bad suckers. you get to hear about it...and the fact that my bathroom just has a shower faucet in the middle of the bathroom so everything gets wet every morning...therefore, I am living in the lap of luxury.

and I made eggs this morning and real coffee. life is a delight. and it's Geoffrey's birthday. the old man has turned 69 we are all very happy and went out to eat. unfortunately, during geoffrey's speech he told everyone about a, um, mishap?

the other day, geoffrey would not stop pestering me (and by the other day--I mean every day) and I was fed up. he non-stop harrasses me verbally and sometimes tries to sit on me. so I warned him that if need be I was not afraid to punch him. I warned him many times. ordinarily, I am STRONGLY against physical violence; however, I grew up with brothers. I am used to people sitting on me (ahem, matthew, even though you never read this--so Ill say whatever I want) and I have been trained to throw a punch/take one. and so finally, after 7 months of this--I punched Geoffrey, twice in the arm, and he punched me back. and I felt like we had settled things he left me in peace(for the rest of the day)...flash forward through the weekend...Geoffrey wears short-sleeves to work...a rarity...and proceeds to show everyone a HUGE, blue bruise. there were gasps and looks of horror...it is very non-thai to be confrontational. but ya know what...I really don't feel bad for hurting the elderly. sometimes you gotta do it...I plead self-defense.

the secret of the thais--

2009-12-14T07:54:00.000-08:00

I found it. don't worry. I now know the secret to the thais' innate ability to handle the heat. Today in the mall I looked over and saw the tiniest little asian baby (Im not sure it was Thai--you really can't assume). Anyway this petite little guy was wearing sweatpants, sweater, beanie, and mittens. yes, yes, it is Christmas time. however, shortly after this encounter I walked outside to catch a bus and by the time I alighted on the bus I was sweating. I think they just make the babies sweat out all their possible sweat at a young age and then for the rest of their lives they go around flawlessly non-sweaty with straight, sleek hair that's unaffected by the humidity...now if I could only find the secret to how they stay so tiny while eating things drenched in grease...hmm...

In response to yesterday--yes of course I can learn and grow in the U.S....but it's kinda like the difference between yoga and hot yoga. sure you can become better at yoga and more fit--but why don't we stick you in a sauna like room so you sweat twenty times more...and you get better results. this is my analogy to me learning more in Thailand--it really is like the sauna version of my life...better, quicker results in learning/growing? we shall see.

The Power of Pink

2009-12-13T02:50:00.000-08:00

I was feeling a bit sickish the last couple of days... so I am currently getting my room cleaned by the maid. have I mentioned how much I love Thailand's service oriented society? It's a delight. As I sit here, I am sipping my delightful emergen-C (that my beloved Cassidy brought me--knowing how prone I am to sickness before trips). This drink is pink...and on the back it says... "The color pink carries many connotations. Power, strength, and energy aren't usually among them. Until now." maybe that's where thailand got the belief that pink is the power of health. darn those good advertising agents. perhaps Ill put up a photo of myself in my pink polo.

Confession: I thoroughly enjoy taking photos of myself with my webcam. I think webcams are the new pools of the proverbial Narcissism fate. roughsies.

Second Confession: I had a freakout moment yesterday and counted down the weeks till I came home. not a freakout because I wanted to come home, but a freakout in that there's so much more I want to do. not that I don't miss you all terribly--but in my mind I have so much more to learn...and...need more time to grow.

...I think my whole life I've been waiting to become the second Anne of Green Gables. You know, the mature, brilliant, poised, beautiful one that doesn't talk as much as the obnoxious child and uses much more appropriate vocab. Then I read a review that criticized L.M. Montgomery for having too swift a change in her character--well crap. wish somebody woulda told me sooner that it takes a lot longer to become your second self. but at least for now...there are such wonderful kindred spirits in the world to console me. props to them. just a thought.

-CD

pink is the new....everything.

2009-12-08T06:38:00.000-08:00

(Tiller and I -ziplining-monkeys really shouldn't be so creepy they have such fab lives.)

Last time the king was in the hospital he came out wearing a pink shirt because the doctor suggested that he wear it since pink was the color of health...It is the king's birthday month--he is still in the hospital....I shall be wearing pink all month.

my life is weird. but strangely wonderful too. today-I got to act out part of a reading story with my tutoree using her stuffed dogs. I think I enjoyed this waaayyyyy more than she did. its just too much fun. I will sacrifice my dignity for learning. doesn't that sound noble and self-sacrificing? but really teaching is so egotistical--I get to ramble on a microphone for a couple hours a day. they really should supervise me...but they don't. so I teach things like, "surfer dude, valley girl, inapprop, obvi. duh." I've convinced myself that its really necessary for their well-being if they go to the states, but really its just way fun. I bring up as many references to shows that they might watch as possible--molly you'd be so proud.

today I also walked around victory monument pointing at people with pink polos and saying, "where? buy?" I have learned no thai but excellent broken English. sometimes when talking to native speakers I find myself rephrasing my sentences immediately into easier syntax. this can't be good for my future schooling.

where have all my commenters gone? did I scare you away with the talk of a private blog? Im still toying with the idea, but for now this incessant ego rambling is free for all. I mean after all this is what I do all day every single day!

P.S. I miss being called, "CD" and "Chris". no one here ever calls me that. interesante.

Patta-YA. I really must work on my tones.

2009-12-07T06:12:00.000-08:00

relax--11 grapes--grape juice. only one was wine.
Turns out--my weekend plans involved going to a beach that is run by Russian mafia--seriously, the city of Pattaya is full of russians; people kept trying to speak to me in Russian and all the menus were in Russian. so random. but I managed to get past my disgust for there being so many farangs (foreigners)--mostly I just stare at white people and think farang what are you doing here...and then I realize that random people are taking my picture...and I snap back to the reality that I am oh so very white.

So this weekend--first we went to a vineyard--which was more of a grape juice factory than a winery. but alas I settled for some awesome grape juice. Thailand has just really not mastered the whole wine thing. but the vineyard was beautiful and had a windmill--and we could pretend we were in Italy. until we realized we had no transportation back to the city, which forced Lauren and I to look vulnerable and lost in the parking lot. (don't worry we avoided the sketchy guys.) we opted to approach younger girls in a family (non-threatening) and hitch a ride in a truck back to town partially-then hopped a bus and made it home safe. thai people are the sweetest.

The next morning I went zip-lining. apparently, its supposed to simulate the flight of the gibbons. so for three hours I managed to forget my fear of heights and swing through the rain forest. It was incredible--probably one of my favorite adventures ever. it rivals paragliding over the swiss alps for sure!

Then the next day I headed to the beach a little ways away from the dirty pattaya city. and saw gorgeous turquoise water while I sipped a smoothie and played cards and read. and people watched. there were so many russians who must just be thrilled not to be in eskimo-type clothing--thus they went full-swing the other way and were virtually wearing no clothing at all. or speedos with inappropriately placed zippers. you are right, dad. tv lies. we are not beautiful people.

But, it was a glorious weekend--and now back to school.

as far as school goes--recently a student told me "tea-CHER, you have galaxy in eye. " thumbs up. no idea what it means but I smile at the effort of any english being spoken. also my tutoree and I spent an hour the other day figuring out a dance for Miley Cyrus' "life's a climb"--really, ESL may be my calling in life. however, I am unfortunately no longer able to volunteer at the refugee center because the Saturday morning program was closed due to security issues. so please pray I find another viable volunteering option.

I will try and write again soon so I don't overwhelm you with these long posts about my life. but really this helps me keep track of it. so thanks for reading my personal details.
-CD

2009-11-29T06:53:00.000-08:00

I realize I am uncharacteristically posting twice in one day--but that last post was supposed to be posted yesterday evening, but alas my internet connection is on the fritz. I actually don't really have internet in my room--thus I feel very disconnected from the world. fyi.

but I just wanted to communicate that the monkey festival was a delight--minus the fact that I had forgotten that I have an intense fear of monkeys. You can just see the old souls in their faces--cranky old souls. One of them wacked me in the head with a tail. The day was quite interesting as we mostly got around by using Lauren's sketch of a sunflower to communicate that we also wanted to see sunflower fields--but it turned out that people in Thailand are just so sweet and gave us rides in the back of their trucks on top of their jackfruit. mmmhmmm. good interesting day away from pollution.

sa-wa-dee-ka!

2009-11-28T08:11:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving to me.

-sports day--students dancing to candyshop by christina aguilera, students with brooms in witches outfits, space outfits, and pirate costumes while the kids in the bleachers have -check.

-thanksgiving--fave foods and delightful people who didn't even know what turkey was-check.

-Friday--discovering free bbq and ribs-check.

-Saturday-- free Swedish massage-check.

Julia and Julie-I love Meryl Streep--she just IS sparkle. no matter what.

Tomorrow--monkey festival, holla. apparently this town a couple of hours away sets out food once a year for the monkeys to feast. I enjoy a good feast-I shall attend.

Have I mentioned that Bangkok has around 8 million people. traffic at all hours--midnight. 5. or 14. 1 in 24 people in Thailand is a sex worker of some sort. there are no trashcans. soi (street) dogs abound usually with a nasty case of mange. and I am thankful that I live here.

so even if no one remembered to say happy thanksgiving--since Im not there--and let's face it--the adage 'out of sight, out of mind' trumps 'absence makes the heart grow fonder', a student following me out of class to ask me her chances of meeting Taylor Laurent when she goes to America makes it worth it.

Minutiae.

2009-11-18T01:08:00.001-08:00

I hate figuring out loan deferment payments. being a grown up is definitely not all its cracked up to be. that's my depressing beginning.

On the flipside--I have joined a gym and am contemplating if I am going to work out before I head up to "tacos y salsa" for some much needed mexican food on hump day. hoorah. its been six months--and all I want is some las verdes--shoutout to my ninfa's buddies, although I doubt any of you read this, which leads me to my next point... I am seriously considering making my blog private. therefore--if you want to be on the list you need to message me (christyddavis@gmail.com). I have just been feeling a bit exposed lately. I mean my deepest thoughts are just out there for the world to see if they so choose... I mean my sort of deep thoughts, maybe just one inch below the surface. you don't even have a clue what Im thinking..Im like an onion...so many layers...and Ill make you cry if I want. wait, that was too far with the analogy--I take it back. my point is--readers, if you want, message me so that I know.

If I have any random stalkers--go ahead and send me a message, Ill see if you make the cut.

meanwhile. TOMORROW is the football match...apparently my students only get to play one soccer game a year. so sad. and they always lose. its been 8 years since they've won--since the other team is an actual team. we don't even have a mascot. I think we should be the kings, no? that's probably not ideal. what about the monarchs like the butterfly?

Peace out A-town.

feeling angsty in Bangkok,
CD

much to my chagrin...

2009-11-11T07:22:00.000-08:00

Best sugar-coated mystery fruit ever!

silkworm--juicy but good.

Lynn and I with some bubbly.

Apparently I suck at updating things later on. Ima writer at the moment I think of it--my whole goal to carefully reconstruct my trip for my readers has been a major fail. sorry. but I will give you bits and pieces along the way while its still fresh in my mind. Because it really is important to document these things--Im just doing a terrible job at it. apologies dear readers (Gaga--Im glad you read this and I am trying to journal my trip like you said to :) )

but right now--there's a world film festival going on here in bangkok. so I just got home from watching a documentary about poverty in Mexico called Los Herederos. much to my chagrin there was very little Spanish and it was a very different dialect than I am used to--but the movie was very good for being almost completely silent.

So lately--I've been going to movies, eating American food, and really enjoying Bangkok. Last weekend-- Ryan's tutor family took several of us to the most amazing buffet place ever. and then Seaves' uncle took us to an awesome restaurant. To be honest I don't eat much Thai food other than what's at lunch and its kinda cafeteria food so Im doing a bad job eating real thai food regularly. I just really really like good food--that's the truth. but if I say, "ah, yeah when I travel I really like to experience the culture and the cuisine" I sound so much better. but really I like to eat. speaking of--here's a tidbit from China.

First night--Tiananmen square. Roasted Duck. tons of people b/c it was the 60th anniversary of the PRC--wow. can we say propaganda galore. and large float like gaudy things crowding up the square. but a delightful time.

Second Day-- Tiananmen square, forbidden city (lots of steps--lots of pretending to be Mulan), night market ( things I ate: silk worm, starfish, eel, fruit candies, bubbling soda, dumplings, seahorse.) Im adventurous.

I LOVED CHINA.

First leg of my trip!

2009-11-02T07:49:00.000-08:00

So on my first day of travel--October 2--air asia (the ryan air of asia--for those of you who know about ryan air) delayed our flight from kuala lumpur to China. but we would not be discouraged at the beginning of our travels--so we turned our 6 hour layover into a quick trip into the city to see the petronas twin towers (the second tallest building in the world!). here's a photo...I am working very hard at my solo shots. since I am similarly working on my independence. there's gotta be some perks to being an adult other than figuring out loan payments, right? so here's to my independence! and here's to Malaysia--good job on the English (they speak English really well!)

Anyway--we left our apartments around 2 Pm on Saturday October2, and arrived in Beijing at about 2 Pm on October 3rd--and thus begins my epic journey. more to come.

-CD

Just a little hello!

2009-10-30T22:25:00.000-07:00

I saw the Taj.

2009-10-26T00:35:00.000-07:00

here's proof. I will write more later--currently Im quite ill from Indian food--even though it is my fave new cuisine. also, (this probably shoulda come first) CONGRATS MOLLY AND DAVID!!! they are engaged. hooray!

To India!

2009-10-20T00:47:00.000-07:00

clearly the great wall to my right. I suck at photos--maybe there's some good group ones I can steal.

halong bay-me being sad about photos.

Alright--so layover in Bangkok for a couple hours in order to gear up for India. I am unbelievably pumped about India and seeing the Taj Mahal. Its just one of those things I never thought I'd see. Traveling just makes learning easier. that's what I've discovered, and that actually I know very very little.

We were very blessed to have gorgeous weather all the way up the coast of Vietnam. I got to see a gorgeous beach, a couple of UNESCO world heritage sites, and Ha Long Bay. Unfortunately, Im an idiot and lost two hundred of my photos by accidentally pressing a button. Most of vietnam was wiped from camera. This photo is of me in Halong bay being sad about it. not necessarily the best photo--my camera is not quite up to par...but you can see the rocks jutting up in the background and my sweaty, pensive self!Thankfully, I can steal Lynn and Cass' photos which are infinitely better than mine. and I can do some justice to my travels. I plan on detailed photo blogs when I return. Oh goodness, a new semester is starting in less than a week. I just reached the halfway point in Thailand. I feel there's still so much to learn, do and read. and ya know--grad school apps. but for now...I shall bask in the gloriously hot India sun, in very modest clothing while I marvel at the taj and other things, like the oldest mosque in India. and maybe Ill get a henna tattoo. In prep for a real tattoo. we shall see.

I just caught up on many of your blogs, and I miss you dearly. and really do wish that I was going to Baylors homecoming. we did a sic 'em on top of the great wall! also, I have not sent postcards on this october trip--Im just bad at it, and I can't remember who I've sent postcards too--so if I sent you one--you should probably tell me. I don't think some people got theres--there's a lot a LOT of things to keep up with traveling. passport trumps postcards. this is my apology. however, if you want to send me mail. I'd LOVE it....unabashedly so.

-CD

china-vietnam

2009-10-12T03:26:00.000-07:00

I dont really have time to do this blog justice, but just so ya know...updates will be coming. china was awesome and cold. and celebrating the 60th anniversary of the PRC. pretty exciting stuff. and vietnam is a delight--we are training up the coast-I am of course sunburnt. but its good. and I will tell you all more later. I miss you guys,
-CD
p.s. sorry this blog is such a tease. more to come. promise.

just think--great wall, forbidden city, mudbaths, mekong delta, haircut (not really info on that one), and beach time...to come!

Who could know? (said in a high-pitched Dutch accent)

2009-09-25T22:40:00.000-07:00

A couple weekends ago, a few of my friends and I jaunted over to chinatown. have I mentioned that bangkok is huge? I could literally find a new area of the city every weekend-its quite daunting. but anyway, our thai friends took us to Chinatown and ordered food for us. delicious shark fin soup (Im afraid that they are destroying all the sharks-and this is bad, maybe I should adopt this cause). but it was good and we ate some other stuff that I have no idea what it was--and then came dessert. It was rice dough balls filled with sesame in a ginger soup. and it was awesome. I just realized that I have completely neglected to tell you dear readers about the culinary delights (that I am oftentimes subjected to with less favorable outcomes.) but mostly good.

at lunch time, dessert consists of strange gelatin things. sometimes in coconut milk and then you add ice. most times corn is somehow involved. yes, corn is a dessert food. they have corn sundaes at kfc. no lie. but you know what else they put in their ice cream-beans. straight up beans. and it is surprisingly good. I mean who knew bean icecream was the way to go--lynn's response is the classic, "asians, we know what's up."

this is me with one of our friends who took us to chinatown.

Gimme gimme, I need, I need

2009-09-22T08:18:00.000-07:00

that's how the streets of Bangkok make me feel. there's just so much bombarding me--and for so cheap. and I have discovered that I do fit into some of the clothing. unfortunately, this discovery was a tad awkward. for the most part, I shy away from the clothing on the streets, its' just one size normally--small thai size. but the other day as I was walking home from working out- I discovered these nice black shorts in sizes. so I pull them out --I look at the lady, "me, fit?" "oh yes yes" "me? fit?" (I ask everything twice b/c you just never know) "you-try" and before I know it the lady is helping me try on the shorts over my workout clothes. sweet action--the lady is actually buttoning me up on the street. mortified I hold up my shirt while she buttons me and touches my hips saying "fit. good. good." (ah, why is this woman touching my hips so reassuringly?-I do feel like these fit well though--hoorah) "oh, okay. yeah. I buy. " quickly without falling over I yanked the pants off and bought them.

later, I pondered--why is it so okay for someone to button me up in the middle of the streets? while people stare at me. then I thought about my purchase. these'll be great travel shorts, I surmised. and smugly I walked home-tossing aside modesty for a great deal!

Bangkok-streets of gold. or at least dirt cheap clothing.
P.S.- fam, what's the title of this blog from?

what to do.

2009-09-11T08:55:00.001-07:00

I hesitate to write this...I prefer to keep my blog perfectly free of any real emotion or thoughtful words, rather I let myself ramble in stream-of-consciousness about the mundane things of my life here in Bangkok. but I have had a lot of time to think and read lately...and I've been...alone. I realize now that its been almost a year and a half since I have spent any time alone. Starting with my semester in Maastricht I have been completely surrounded by people at almost every waking moment. The only times I've been alone I've been studying, and thankfully most of that time was spent with my dear studious friends. but after I teach, I come home, and I read. and I think. and I like it. this is actually not what I wanted to talk about. but I just wanted to give some background into the fact that there's been a lot of processing going on.

8 years ago today, I sat in Spanish class and heard the news about 9-11. I didn't understand how horrifyingly momentous this event really was--and it truly was awful. For weeks, months it was on the tip of everyone's tongue. As I sit here now and imagine how much it was discussed--my mind flits back to an article I read the other day. It stated that every two days in the Congo there are as many people dying that died on 9-11. Every two days. another calamity.

In no way does this trivialize what happened on 9-11. The loss of human life can never be trivialized, only silenced.

The only thing is--is how is this happening and I don't know? and even bigger than that--there are problems everywhere. what are you supposed to do?

There's a character in Bleak House by Dickens who is repeatedly described as, "only having eyes for Africa." Dickens satirizes her as a "cause" woman who fails to take care of her family as she works herself to death sending letters out about Africa--so according to Dickens--that's not the right option.

But do you pick a cause, support it? do I choose one day to only wear eco-friendly clothing or eco-coffee? do I choose to care about the orphans and the refugees? or the living wage? do they cross each other out at times...

Or do you block it out because, lets face it, that's all I ever really want to do...

or do you write emo blogs so that three people will read and think, "ah wow, that is sad."

"...there's gotta be a better way, a better way..." (this song is in no way appropriate for this heavy topic--but it is what is running through my brain)--what to do.

if you do want to read a blog-that actually does say something (although in my opinion, its a little convoluted) but it tells more about what's going on and how to help- www.fallingwhistles.com

2009-09-09T03:50:00.000-07:00

Good Morning Bangkok!

2009-09-05T19:43:00.000-07:00

Standing on the railroad tracks built during WWII called the death railroad because so many died while building it. (This is when I went to Kanchanaburi with all the teachers a couple weekends ago.)

Seaves and I riding on an elephant in Kanchanaburi--later I sat where the driver was--our elephant was huge.

Dear esteemed blog readers,

Yesterday was a delightful today. It began with volunteering at the refugee center where we are starting a writing workshop with the refugees. A lot of them have to write letters to the UN and other buisiness type requests--however, its quite a wide range of skills which makes it quite tiring. After working on writing, we switched into more basic parts of speech. Unfortunately, I forgot that I was teaching adults and when asked what an interjection was I shouted "Wow!" and threw my hands into the air, and all the helpers just looked at me like why? It was embarrassing-but one of the participants later said that he really wanted to learn interjections--so ya know, maybe some good came out of that...I am really enjoying the refugee center and hoping to find out more about each person's story. stay tuned.

After volunteering, Seaves and I met up with Tiller and Lynn and babysat Suzie (fellow teacher)'s kids. It was a ton of fun (I know, I know, I don't like kids--but these kids really are an exception). We went to Siam Ocean World and there were PENGUINS!!! and we got to ride in a glass bottom boat over sharks--it was the best aquarium ever- I definitely had more fun than the kids. Oh and we got to have mac and cheese for lunch, which is quite exciting when you don't have a kitchen. It was a good good day. But, I was pretty tuckered out--so I skipped church this morning and am going to head up to the gym soon, I lucked out and have a free membership for a month--right before my October break.

I purchased my flights--Im off to China, Vietnam, and India-please be in prayer for the trip!

Oh also, yesterday was only 84 degrees. what a delight!

My camera is now fixed--I am desperately trying to become a more avid phototaker-I will do my best--these photos weren't even taken by my camera.

As always, thank you for the comments,

-CD

Epiphany

2009-08-29T10:09:00.000-07:00

languages are difficult. Last weekend I volunteered at a refugee center here in Bangkok. I helped teach English to adults, and it was nice teaching to people that actually wanted to learn. There was a lady in my group who knew almost no English at all--I finally figured out that she spoke French, and I got super pumped and started trying to use all the French I knew which was very very little. apparently to retain languages you have to continually use them, thus I know tidbits of spanish, latin, and french, what a drag. but the lady was precious and maybe it did some good. who knows, I never really know if Im teaching anything whatsoever. I was feeling quite down about teaching in the last couple of weeks. but then I remembered a dear manager at Ninfa's reminding me (whenever I was getting all stressed out because the other managers were consistently yelling and stressing us all out) that at the end of the day- we are not saving lives, we are just serving food. so true.

Im just in front of a class speaking English pretty much and hoping beyond all hope that someone learns something. at first I was super concerned about being strict and teaching everything perfectly; however, with languages the most important thing is to practice. and that requires speaking...so I've adopted a new method...less worry and more chatting. although its a lot harder this way. Its actually easier to just assign exercises and talk about grammar its much harder to motivate kids. but ultimately they either want to learn english or they don't so at least one person in that classroom will be having fun-me. Ive brought back some of my old drama games for classes, and I also found a mulan tape the other day. I made all the kids listen to my favorite theme song, "be a man" and write down as much of the words as possible...I had to help reiterate...and I had a mic and hand motions...the kids thought I was crazy, but I loved it. Afterwards, Lynn gave me a skeptical look...was that for you or for them? but the song WAS in English so it has to help right? you guys have any fun active games for students who barely speak English? so far I love m1 because they are 7th graders and just get really excited if I allow them out of their desks. m5--a lot more challenging. I decided to sit in desks beside them while they did their work trying to help/ make them do it. I mean they have to speak English to me, right? I don't know...we shall see...

A student asked me to write her a recommendation for studying abroad. I am super pumped about this, Im not sure why, I guess because I am always asking for recommendations so now I feel really excited about doing it for someone else.

A blog dedicated to Megan...

2009-08-21T09:33:00.001-07:00

This is Megan and I on my 21st birthday. I wish I could celebrate your 24th Megs! You are really important to me. Thank you for making me cupcakes telling me I was interesting, and bringing me flowers, just because. You are awesome. Hope today is spectacular!

Clearly, I like Megan a lot and she was not in my previous post. Hence, not being in my last post is not a reflection on whether I like you a lot or not. You know if I do. Im effusive. love love love,
-CD
Update: currently finding directions to help out with refugees, still desiring tutoring, still planning october, looking for grad schools, and figuring out wisdom tooth extraction. and had an awesome Mexican dinner. Suzie and Kirk and their children are a delight and I'm very thankful for them.

People. that I like a lot.

2009-08-19T06:05:00.001-07:00

My coworkers in the office: Star, Me, Lynn, and Ryan

I just wanted you all to know that these were delightful roommates of mine through the years. and I like them a lot. (Lindsey, Me, Cassidy, Melissa, and Molly)

Dabbling...

2009-08-18T08:46:00.000-07:00

3months. bam. today I have been here in delightful congested smoggy Bangkok for three months. I can not believe it at all. It seems just yesterday I was graduating and yelling at my family to hurry up and take photos because I was wet and looked like a bedraggled cat. something that happens often here in bangkok. the bedraggled cat part, not the fam photos. obvi, duh. The last time I went out of the country I came back right at three months--so far I don't have any feelings that this will be a much longer time. I feel pretty good. I did feel that I missed out for the first time at Kristen's wedding. Congrats Kristen and Jeff! but other than that--its not like I really have anything to go home too seeing that everyone is now moving on with their life. which is exciting--shout outs to those starting medschool and grad school and grown-up jobs! I am excited for you all. its weird that I didn't have a summer-I feel like I just dove right in. and its been good.

I did have a bad class experience, some 9th graders mutineed. hopefully that'll blow over. sometimes Im too mean-shocking, I know. and sometimes, I just laugh and can't control the class, not so shocking. oh well, you live and you learn. I have parent teacher meetings all this week, which consist of me sitting at the side of an assembly room listening to teachers speak in Thai and then awkwardly waiting for parents to come talk to me, and they never do, because I don't speak their language. mm. what a good way to spend an afternoon. other than that I'd be planning my trip for October (more to come on that :) )

I normally get home around five, and lately I have been doing quite a bit of reading. I recommend A Confederacy of Dunces and Reading Lolita in Teheran. both awesome. I've really fallen in love with reading again. I think I could be happy reading all my life and just dabbling in other things--travel. writing. impacting lives. little soap star action. maybe some tv reviewing. a couple angsty poems. I would like to be a dilettante. ya know-amateurishly dabbling, unfortunately that has a negative connotation. but maybe people have that wrong. sometimes that happens, maybe amateur should mean young and free-spirited and less serious-not frivolous, just not professional. hmm. Im going to go ponder and read. more to come...

Finding the right words...

2009-08-04T03:51:00.000-07:00

Lately, I've thought a lot about word choice. It's become a constant struggle in my daily life to choose the right words to explain something. If you know me, you know this struggle has not caused me to use fewer words-- Frequently I find myself confusing my students completely by giving them too many synonyms and wild gestures to explain words. I am finally learning facial expressions, small hand gestures, and a few small words certainly do the trick. maybe this technique will improve my writing. who knows, I've done a lot of reading lately--and there's so many styles that who knows whats even good. anyone have ideas for grad schools for me for English? I haven't picked a time period either--contemporary is looking quite appealing at the moment. Oh goodness, this all started with finding the right words...for me to tell you a story...

I thought I'd start with... A harrowing escapade, A narrow escape, or something grand like that--but really, IT ALL STARTED WITH THE SHOES.

A week and a half ago I went to Erawan falls to hike up some waterfalls, and in anticipation of this event- I bought some stellar shoes. They were sporty and airy and seemed water-friendly. All day I had been boasting about how great these shoes were for the trekking, and I felt like quite the outdoor adventurer, which, as it turns out, was not quite the case...

After braving a few waterfalls, sliding down an awesome natural slide, and having an absolute delightful time, my friend Ryan decides to hike between the 5th and 6th tier of waterfalls by water rather than land. Keep in mind, there about 11 of us on this excursion, there was no need for me to follow Ryan--everyone else sensibly took the path. Also, keep in mind, Ryan actually is a legit outdoor adventurer, he actually hitch-hiked through new zealand and slept outside in woods by himself. But, I decide that, since I am equipped with awesome water shoes, that I too should follow Ryan on his water path.

At first, it was grand and beautiful and fun, and then tragedy. Ten minutes into our walk I somehow stumbled upon a bee nest. I felt a stinging sensation on my left side, and I started screaming wildly. Ryan, scared by my scream and having no idea why Im bending over, suddenly realizes that Im being attacked by a swarm of bees. Being the actual outdoorsman that he is, starts wisely yelling at me to get out of the spot I am...so I start scrambling through the water as I get stung right on my eyelid. We dashed upstream to deep water where Ryan used his shirt to smack the bees that were collecting around my head, while I tried to submerge myself in water to stop the merciless attack of the bees. In a few seconds the bees who had followed me were gone. and Ryan and I sat in the water, as Ryan tried to keep me from being hysterical. and I breathed calming breaths and tried not to think about the strange red marks all over my back and head. We struggled out of the water as Ryan asks, "are you okay?" my feeble response was, "I mean, I've been better." I'm not much for putting on a show of bravery while my body aches. Once out of the water we ran into our friends, I hastily handed my contacts to someone (my eye was swelling dangerously at this point) and we began the trek down the mountain.

We stopped by a rest stop and got some menthol for my bites. Ryan's swelled considerably more than mine and his were on his hands and on his stomach (mostly because he'd been saving my head). In all, I think I had about 40 bites, but thankfully, neither one of us were too badly injured. So props, to Ryan's skills at beating off bees, without him, I might still be flailing madly about in the water without a clue.

Later, we both admitted that our first thought had been, "killer bees". That's as far as my thought process had gone, but in his mind he had already mapped out a plan for us to breathe under water while the bees were hovering. hmm, I should probably not try to be outdoorsy for awhile.

But, I'm going back this weekend with some teachers from school. I think I'll take a little different route!

Erawan Falls pictures are here !
till next time,
CD

Just 6?

2009-07-28T05:09:00.000-07:00

http://picasaweb.google.com/christyddavis/Cambo?feat=embedwebsite. I think if you click this you can see my cambo pics. Im technologically challenged. and can't make it cute.

SoI know that I am severely behind on telling you my adventures, and I know that there are many aspects of my life that I have just completely left out. you see, I don't ever actually plan my blogs at all. I know, that's completely shocking based on the total lack of coherent thought process that proceeds from my fingers. so I am sure that there are just things that are lacking. so if you have any questions about my life here, feel free to write them down in the comments section. and I may grant a response. anyway, I am not yet ready to detail my recent escapade, so instead I am going to write down 6 little things that make me happy because I've been tagged by laura.

1. I live on the fifth floor of my apt. complex--there's actually about 23 floors. I feel kinda like I live in a high-rise apt. in a buzzing metroplex just like I've always dreamed- and I kind of do. never thought the metroplex would be bangkok. but I really like living up high. right now my balcony is open as I sit here and blog.

2. my bed is huge. bigger than a queen. I normally sleep with many of my belongings strewn about me. and I love it. it makes me happy to sprawl about and kick things out of my way, while slightly cursing that I have nothing to stare at on the walls because I lack all domestic skills whatsoever.

3. every time I hear a student say "tea-CHER" to me, I am thrilled- I am not sure why, but I adore it. j'adore!

4. also, I adore every time a student "wai"s me. its pronounced "Y" and its when the students put their hands together in front of them and bow to me. they do it when they see me. when they turn something in. when I encourage them. when I hand them a test. when the come into a room. when they thank me at the end of class. its glorious. sometimes the students don't always do it--probably because Im foreign so I don't receive as much respect. but their ecstatic waves in place of it are acceptable.

5. every time I hear the words "tea-CHER tea-CHER you so BEAUTiful". the little suck-ups have it down to a skill.

6. when lynn looks over at me and says, "Christy, this is NOT a mai pen rai situation." apparently I try and say that about everything--and lynn, who makes all my decisions for me (that's a big thing that makes me happy) has decided that there are sometimes when that phrase does not work, much to my chagrin.

Dear ones, you all make me happy as well, but most of you are big things. no not physically. that would be rude. although over here it is not rude to tell someone they are big (not one of my 6 little things). anyway, I digress. many of you are a big part of my life and I appreciate the comments. and will try and respond to e-mails and comments more efficiently. I do adore correspondence.

Im wai-ing you all and signing off,
CD

"Tuk-tuk? I love you."

2009-07-20T07:50:00.000-07:00

Sometimes people just yell random things at me--its like oh white person, or "farang" in Thai--let's yell at her--we'll ask her to ride in our vehicle and then tell her we love her so that she'll pay an exorbitant price. hehe. it almost works. I laugh or frown and keep walking. what can you do?

every once in awhile I realize Im the only white person around, and I like it. and then I stare at other white people--and think ah, tourists. Ive convinced myself Im a local since I have an address and I proudly tell cab drivers that I need an apartment not a hotel. so local. although I don't speak a word of thai due to my tonal deafness. it really sucks. but I try a bit and smile. what can you do?

Today, I had to have a serious chat with one of my students who had written something inappropriate. I actually did none of the talking--I made Geoffrey do it. I felt like I was getting in trouble, as I sat there listening to the boy get told he had to write me an apology. Me? I thought, why does he have to write ME an apology. oh whoops that's right. Im not the student. Im the teacher that he's disrespecting. weird. I don't feel like Im old enough for someone to disrespect. but, what can you do?

One of my classes has a snake, a hamster, and a rabbit in the classroom. Ive found I like these students much better. I gave them free time the other day--mostly because I wanted it--my only stipulation was they could not feed Pierre the hamster to the snake. It was quite scary, I petted the snake and they all laughed at my horrified face. but, I wanted to be involved. so what could I do?

Ill pet a snake if that's what it takes to get anywhere near the students listening to me. the rest of the time I find myself saying ridiculous things like "do you know how rude you are being?" "you are being disrespectful" "whine all you want, Im not changing your homework" and my favorite "because I said so"--these phrases just spill out of me--it's like the universal language of teachers or something. what can I do?

to be continued...

Ah. I have so much to tell.

2009-07-09T04:16:00.000-07:00

Well. I think Ill just tell you about Cambodia and then try and fill out the other random details of my life. Thanks for reading guys, this one might be a little long-winded. feel free to take breaks, drink some coffee (fresh-brewed and think of me with all my insta-coffee).

I woke up at 3:30 AM on Saturday July 4th to start my trek to Cambodia. I rode a non air-conditioned 3rd class bus for 6 hours. It was jostling the whole time, but I thankfully had a seat, many people did not. This was the beginning of a trip where I learned just how snobby and blessed I am.

After the train, we were accosted by tuk-tuk drivers rushing us to the "border". So we go to this makeshift outside arena and start to fill out our visa info, only to find out that they wanted to charge us almost twice as much for a visa. absolutely not. so then they pile us back on the tuk-tuk--we fit 6 people in one with our backpacks--if you've seen a tuk-tuk you would know--this is nigh impossible. I sat beside the driver while he held me inside the tuk-tuk with his arm around my legs. great. the man that just tried to scam me now is holding my upper thigh to keep me from perishing. stellar. then he drives me literally about ten feet. as a joke. to another fake border. finally finally, he takes us to the legit border where we go through another 2hour process to get into cambodia. then we get shuttled to the tourist center where they charge you ridiculously inflated prices to get you on a bus to Siem Reap. but you really have no other options so on we go. Halfway through this bus ride, our driver Mr. Lee transforms from a normal human into a non-stop infomercial while he tries to convince us that its actually okay he's not taking us to the bus station but to a hostel where he gets a commission if we stay. He continually repeated you have your freedom you don't have to stay there. freedom. well it is july 4th, the strangest, longest one Ive ever had. finally we get off the bus only to find some men tossing my backpack through an assembly line to get it inside the hostel so that I will be forced to go inside. absolutely not. this is the point that I got angry. full-fledged angry. I dashed through the people and literally yanked my bag away from them. then I harassed Mr. Lee to tell me where my hostel that I had already booked was located. He lied because he said it was about 20 minutes away. so the boys on our trip start heading off to find a hostel, so we followed along because we didn't know what else to do. thankfully golden mango inn was just a minute or two away and we found the sweet refuge of that lovely place. this is where my trip took a delightful turn. from this point on "scambodia" became a more affectionate place known as "cambo".

At the Golden Mango, I slept, and then on Sunday had the most delightful day combing the ruins of Angkor Wat, Angkor Thom, Ta Prohm, and Ta Neil. It was fascinating. It was similar to the ruins of Ayutthya (former capital of Siam which was then sacked by the Burmese) but more fabulous. But the best part of the day, was our tuk-tuk driver. His name was "See You" and he was the most delightful, joyful man ever. I adored him, not only did he give us info about the temples, but he told us about growing up during the Polpot Regime.

Before Cambodia, I was completely clueless about the Polpot Regime. In the 1970's Polpot took over and there was a mass genocide in Cambodia. See you lost his sister and father during that time. He even lived in the forest for months at a time to avoid the worker camps. They separated families and took them to basically concentration camps. He told us about when they beat him and some of the torture that he saw happen to other people. It was mind-boggling to me that this 40yr.old man had dealt with these horrors. I had no idea.

While in Siem Reap, we were constantly surrounded by children trying to sell things. they were adorable and heartbreaking. but even more heart-breaking than the children was Pnom Penh. I don't think I've ever been in a sadder place. I traveled to Berlin and saw all the stuff about East Berlin, but then it had been a longer time ago, and I felt like the city had recovered. I grew up knowing about the Holocaust. but this was a new horror that I faced.

After our day in Siem Reap, we traveled to Pnom Penh on Monday. Our hostel scammed us on transportation costs--but other than that--it wasn't too scambodia-ish. But on Monday night we decided to go eat mexican food at Cantina this restaurant my guidebook had told me about--I was pumped. On the way there I saw a maimed man without arms or legs being harassed by a group of men on the street, and I became nauseous and started gagging. This was the beginning of my physiological response to what I was seeing. I can't even describe it.

The next day we went to the Tol Sleung Museum which had formerly been a highschool and then turned into a prison where they tortured the people. Then if they decided to execute you, you were taken to the killing fields were there are mass graves. They would just hit you or cut your throat and throw you in a big pit. Sometimes, you didn't die right away so they burned you with DDT which also eliminated odor. We visited both the museum --it was the s-21 prison--and the killing fields. There is a huge monument at the fields that is full of skulls, but that didn't bother me near as much as s-21. Seeing the faces of the captives some of them were my students' ages, and seeing the mangled bodies was unbelievably hard. I had to keep walking out to get fresh air and gag-- I can't even begin to process that that was a reality for so many people--such a short time ago. and Cambodia is still reeling from this time. The Khmer Rouge fell in 1979 (the revolution led by Polpot), in just 4 years about 1.7 million cambodians were murdered.

On Wednesday we went on an architecture walking tour(before our flight home) to see the former art-deco glory of Pnom Penh--the city is now rebuilding. but Im so thankful to be back in Bangkok our flight was delayed two hours--I was ready to be home. I didn't do much on Wednesday--I didn't feel too well. Cambodia took its toll. I was glad to be back at work today--even if I did have my most rambunctious classes.

A week in the life of...

2009-06-24T08:06:00.000-07:00

* I taught my 10th graders about reading for context clues today--clearly that is something that everyone could learn. actually less of context clues, maybe just reading, "Geoffrey, one of the OLD British men in my office". sorry you guys felt mislead. no I am not falling in love. BKK--not quite the place. but I am having an enjoyable time...here's what my life consists of...

Last Friday- wake up at 6, ride in a van at 7, purchase breakfast--yogurt, pastry--sit around the office pretending to work, but really just sharing pointless random anecdotes.
class, lunch (probably left early slightly annoyed that everyone is reminding me of my pointless anecdote)--sit in office think about what the heck I just ate--feel pretty good about it. teach some more--kick a girl out of class. go home. change. mbk--harass a fraudulent man for about thirty minutes till he gives me back my money--actually more money (hey fifty baht). Its amazing, what persistence can do. think about how Ill tell the office about this on monday-another pointless anecdote. watch 17 again, again. sleep. (oh yes, this was all accomplished with lynn, tiller, and seaves as usual)

Saturday- Jim Thompson (silk man-google it) site seeing house. market action post-poned--its apparently night time market--no big. park time. market. go home. change. head out to a lebanese style bar on a garage roof. meet up with others. there's always so much to do that's new and exciting.

sunday-church, mediterranean food, laundry, rest/pretend to plan future weekends and upcoming Cambodia trip.

monday- school, resting day (I sit in my room trying to be cool (temperature-wise, clearly not the other one), journal,read moll flanders, learn some thai, organize computer files,register with us embassy, wonder why Im not studying something, do some exercise, pretend to learn french off rosetta stone, dinner down the street, watch a movie with tiller.)

tuesday- school, yoga (with teachers in thai-- brilliant, since I was so good at yoga in the first place lets put it in another language and see what cultural/yoga mistakes you make) leave school at 6:30, get detained by a guard with a large gun--uselessly try to communicate that you are in yoga clothes--strange poses, more confusion, rescued by a teacher who informs you that women must be in skirts at all times. wow. whoops. screw-up number 45 by americans.

wednesday-school, home, pay bill, hit up the pool for an hour, go to bible study (get lost, show up late) talk with people I have no idea who they are, question for the 70th time that day my capability as a communicator. go home. listen to some avril lavigne and imogen heap and blog.

Conclusion-I like to be busy. I like to be involved. Im finding my place here. and falling in love...with Thailand, not just my coworkers and students (that was already established). there's just so many new things to do and to learn and to experience.

P.S. I have purchased some postcards--now I just need addresses. so send them to christyddavis@gmail.com and I will respond with my address without you even having to ask!

Highlights, maybe lowlights--I really don't know.

2009-06-17T03:19:00.000-07:00

I'm not feeling particularly inspired today, so I think I'm just gonna give it to you with bullets--I know the public is waiting.
- still slightly peely from weekend trip and still slightly heat rashy-fab.
- I taught my 7th graders the word "hot" for good-looking--this may have been a bad call in retrospect. but one of the girls told me I was sexy the first couple of days--which confused me, I wasn't sure if she really understood the connotation, so I merely did a half-giggle, half-shrug off, with a slight confused look, which Im sure only confirmed her original comment.
- I accidentally showed up 20 minutes late to class today. I was in another meeting--the kids didn't seem to mind seeing that we started only about 5 minutes later than normal. awesome. and I had tried to be all stern about showing up on time--although how can you be stern when there is no specific time. tricky.
- this weekend I got my hair cut, a little scary, I used a picture and a lot of hand motions--my hair turned out a bit too short and a bit more layery--she thinned it a lot--which was weird but actually quite nice considering the weather. then she blow dried it and tried to literally pull my hair straight--I wish I could have communicated that no matter how hard she tried my hair would not become asian straight. alas. the shampooing was amazing and the entire things was about $4.50. sweet.
- speaking of sweet, my mom just sent me an e-mail informing me that she heard me described for the first time as sweet by a fellow ninfa's waiter. nice, mom, nice. but true. I am not sweet.
-today during class as I hovered about the room asking any of them if they needed help I realized teaching is kinda like waiting tables--you hover about asking people if they need something, except this time, I thought, Im serving knowledge instead of food--then I thought that was really funny and almost laughed at myself in class.
- I make jokes in class a lot and sometimes one student laughs--I tell myself its the language barrier--but who really knows--do you think humor's international?
-Amidst my jokes, I sometimes throw in a little Spanish to see if anyone's listening--sometimes even French but not as much because some of them know French. It still normally elicits the same blank stare-- so I really have no idea how much Im understood. I could say anything. oh the freedom.
-Have I mentioned that my job is my favorite thing. favourite, if you're British. apparently Im supposed to know the British spellings now too.
-Geoffrey gave me an UP(movie) folder--he secretly put it on my desk, because we had invited him to go see it with us, but he went by himself--he adores me. I knew it...I think Im going to start having a Geoffrey section of my blog--that seems popular. what should it be called?thoughts?
-CD

Sunburn, heat rash, and various other problems.

2009-06-09T06:35:00.000-07:00

Dear followers,
I apologize for the lack of communication lately. I have been quite consumed with learning/teaching the past simple, present perfect simple, and present perfect continuous to my M. 5 students (11th graders). The reaction is normally a look of complete and utter contempt and disgust for me as a human being, which is quite tiring. Thus, it has taken quite a bit for me to muster up the strength to write this blog. Well actually the students are only slightly taxing compared to dear old Geoffrey. (I do think my British accent is improving though). For some unexplainable reason Geoffrey relishes and delights in teasing me. For example, in the lunch room the English teachers sit by themselves because well we don't know anyone else. So Geoffrey likes to point out every single male teacher to me and ask me if I want to know their age. I unwittingly asked the age of one of the teachers one day, so now Geoffrey has called almost all of the younger male teachers over to meet me and introduces me as "Christy, someone who is looking for love"--his exact words. I mean I already have a language/cultural barrier plus my intuitive social awkwardness around boys-- I really don't need added help from Geoffrey. I think all the teachers know me as the white girl looking for love--stellar. Pretty soon all the workers will know as well-- he introduced me to the teller the other day--and pointed out one of the guards as looking particularly smiley towards me. This could be a long long ten months.

In other news, I went to the beach--it was gorgeous, but exhausting. We went down Friday after work to Koh Samet with a group of about 20 teachers. It was rather fun, but we all got burned, some very uncomfortable heat rash for many of us, bug bites, allergic reactions, a couple foot injuries. The sun there is much stronger than in Texas or California (where the Sacramento State kids are from)--but Im recovering nicely-- my nose is peeling-- I really couldn't get more attractive in Thailand with the sweatiness, the bandages on my ingrown toenails (botched pedicure experiment), the unruly humidified hair, the shockingly pink nose and chin. If I were looking for love, it would not be now or here. But overall, I think I might be getting used to the heat a bit or its just getting cooler! I had octupus sushi the other day--rather rubbery. Ill keep you posted on my other food adventures.

Thank you for all the lovely responses-- I do miss you. Today, I just wanted to be eating lunch in the Sub with my friends like I did every day for the past year-- but then I ate a bunch of rice to overcome that feeling.

-CD

What are you doing?

2009-05-29T02:52:00.000-07:00

This is what I say to my students every day--I want to say much more, but instead I just look mildly annoyed and ask this question--the response is a blank stare and not because they don't know English, but because they have no concept about rules. Its so bizarre. They are really nice and I don't really have problems, except they just mill about the class room and talk until I have to be mean. Im getting much better at it-- I just call them out, like "Why are yall standing up?" "Jump, what do you think you are doing?" "In case I wasn't clear get off your phones." They really are great--most of them are so sweet and smiley. They seem younger than their actual grades and are attentive during actual work--but I think English is not their main concern. and there is a HUGE difference in ability within each class which is quite challenging. Their names are pretty random-- they are either tonal and I cant pronounce it or things like gun or dream. But I do like it so far--even without air con. My M. 5 class-- prounounced "Ma 5" I don't know why--is super spacy and plays their guitars before class, but they are 11th graders-- so what do you expect. I think I scared them today though. I had a block period on a Friday--teaching grammar during the last two class periods--woe. but they behaved because I caught cheaters at the beginning of class and I just stalked about the room for the rest of the time...quite the power trip. but I like it so far-- no idea if they are learning, but we shall see. Tonight Im experiencing the Thai movie theaters--its supposed to be fun.
In response to questions, Jess no I have not been to a wat yet. Im waiting for my school badge because then I will get the thai price! Megs, the other music in the nice malls is American, but mostly in other places its Thai stuff. apparently k-pop is big over here according to my students. I made them all fill out intro sheets and then I wrote down the interesting things by their names in my grade book so I can get to know them! I have about 120 students and I see each one about three times a week--and I can't tell them apart. but its good-- "any questions, I love questions?" I say this every day because they are still scared to ask me things, but when they do its always "tea-CHER, tea-CHER" its hilarious. ok Ill report back after my weekend activities.
-CD

tuk-tuks, thai massage, shopping, free time, storms,street foodetc.

2009-05-24T01:24:00.000-07:00

I am going to continue my bullet point system, I like lists, and it helps me stay organized in my mind which is quite jumbled with my sensory overload

-my toilet is fixed. hooray. life just got better. did I already mention this?
- I experienced a tuk-tuk on Friday-- it was fun, scary, and not as efficient as cabs, transportation is quite difficult around the city so far. Im so thankful they take us to work in the morning I feel safer driving past the many guards with guns when Im enclosed in a van. when we walk out its a bit frightening. so we are experimenting on best ways to get home--its about a forty minute walk home-- and you are drenched with sweat in about a minute-- so its not ideal...and the bus system we haven't quite learned. they drive crazy here! Ive never seen anything like it. actually Ive never seen anything like a lot of what Im seeing.
- the midday storms are incredible. I love watching them from my room-- haven't really gotten caught in one yet.
-I went shopping yesterday--nothing fits me here :( which is a major problem since I definitely don't have enough work clothes-- and my coworkers have style. legit style. Im working on it.
- I came home from shopping and destressed with a thai massage --there's a place in my building. its awesome, painful, weird, but delightful. it was 180 baht for an hour-- roughly 5.25 awesome.
-its weird having free time. on saturday I felt weird just shopping for four and a half hours with nothing else to do-- its really strange, but Ill have lesson plans soon enough--Im completely lost on that front. completely lost.
-I haven't taken any photos yet :( but I did learn how to download photos on to my computer, except some of them my parents took have to be opened in a different program--weird huh? anyone have thoughts/ help on that?
-I start school tomorrow- so so so nervous. Im supposed to be stern. Im so nervous.
-well Im just waiting to hear from Lynn I think we are trekking over to the other teachers apt for a party and swim. we went to a couples house yesterday who has been here for awhile it was super nice and met some international people-- Im also working on ya know making friends. more to come soon!
-CD

new title.

2009-05-22T11:13:00.000-07:00

Mai pen rai means pretty much no worries over here in T-land. so its my new title for now-- because its my new motto. In Europe my motto was I always say yes and Im always ready. it worked out splendidly. so hopefully this new one will work as well. Im still quite jetlagged-- I just woke up from an accidental three hour nap-whoops! but so did Lynn, so I think we are all still a little off plus its pouring down rain so our options are limited. a few of us ate downstairs in the restaurant for 43 baht. hooray. something cheap. Im getting better. I like my coworkers a lot so far...lynn and I are the only current baylor people at the secondary school and we share an office with star, a baylor student from last year returned, and ryan from sacramento is there, and then the thai teachers and two older british men, one of which is Geoffrey. He's hilarious. Im sure Ill have good stories-- he delights in teasing me. definitely more to come on that. we are going to brave the markets tomorrow. I definitely need more clothes. all the teachers dress well-- especially the thai teachers with their tiny little selves in buisiness skirts and heels... and sometimes longsleeved shirts-- I don't understand how they do it.

thanks so much for all the comments and if you want to know more-- just email me, preferably at christyddavis@gmail.com facebook is rather slow/ its blocked at school!

-Christy

HERE!

2009-05-20T18:00:00.000-07:00

Im here and safe!

I don't have time for much writing, Im about to go to an assembly to meet my student's parents-- this is all so fast!

here's a couple of things that have happened--
- I ate Japanese squid
- thought I was going to miss my plane in Tokyo because of quarantine-- people in full-out suits came and took our temperature-- it made me think of Andromeda Strain
- I found out there are massive lizards that I thought were alligators that just hang out around the school where I teach-
-my toilet clogged-- and still is--nice.
- I have an awesome pillow and a huge bed!
- my room is completely blue-- with bright blue shiny curtains-yes. and a gecko-and I killed my first bug without screaming.
- I got scammed twice in a cab already
- I learned to fit six people in a cab-- and the driver told us we were good ladies-- but not good babies. hmm. (he was very nice-- and so is everyone else! it is the land of smiles!)
- I had seaweed chips. interesting.
-did I mention I love the food? I had something similar to panang curry-- but spicier-- yes, Bryan Im such a pro.
- I also may have eaten pigs blood.
- my shower is just in my bathroom as a faucet-- so theres a mirror right by it and a toilet-- so everything is continually wet, but I got a cute rug and trashcan.
- I need more clothes-- I sweat through every thing. everything-- Ive never experienced heat like this-- and apparently this isn't the hottest season.
- apparently Im teaching 7,9,10,11 grades-- sweet!! Im pumped. the kindergarteners came today and I saw them from far away-- PRECIOUS-- they are the cutest ever--
-- overall its all so fast and quick. I haven't mastered the whole money system-- but I sleep without the airconditioning on-- Im quite proud of that-- the air conditioning works AWESOMELY so I only leave it on for a bit. and theres a store on the school grounds-- its like a self-sustaining world... with lots of guards and guns.
so much is going on, but its fascinating!
-CD

To Thailand!

2009-05-17T21:43:00.000-07:00

I am leaving for Thailand tomorrow-- wow. Its so fast I cannot even process. I need to sleep for a couple hours before we drive to Dallas. My parents and Bryan are driving me there-- Bryan just decided to come too! so it'll be a fun morning drive and then off to an adventure. I honestly have no thoughts at the moment-- just a little nervous, but not too bad-- so hopefully I can sleep a bit. I will try and keep this updated more often.

and please pray for me. for safety and just that these ten months will be a good, growing, learning experience for me. I am so thankful to all of you who have invested in me.

also, my wisdom teeth might be coming in-- a little bit of bad timing-- so just prayer that I know what to do about that. ok love yall and Ill write from Thailand!
-Christy

Life's a Climb.

2009-04-12T22:58:00.000-07:00

I apologize for the cheesy title-- yes, it is a Hannah Montana song title and yes, I did go see her movie on opening night. judge me. I like my age.

I apologize for the delay of this blog. I wanted to wait until I had big news. Then, I wanted to wait for more big news:

I passed my thesis defense last Wednesday!

I am moving to Thailand. Most of you know this already, but just thought if I have some random stalkers-- they would want to know as well. go ahead comment.

I will be teaching for ten months, I leave in five weeks. big changes.

so I need a new title for my blog-- thoughts? Its about to get interesting again since Ill be in another country :)

Beautiful.

2009-03-04T14:18:00.000-08:00

Today is beautiful. A- I didn't have class till 1:30. Delight-- so I had a breakfast date with Melissa, where we pretended we were going to study but discussed life plans. B- Its gorgeous. I did have a massive midterm today over thousands of pages of reading-- but it was literature so it was kind of fun. ah nerd. true.

So enough about today-- you poor bloggers probably are dying to know what's been going on in my life lately.

Well SING. glad its over-- although I realized my performance days are OVER. so sad. although there are videos out there... forever. I did this embarassing, cheesy interview for the last weekend of SING that I haven't seen and am a little nervous about its contents seeing as I am wearing a "I live in carroll science" cool. nerd to all of baylor.

Well Pledge Training is over-- I love the new pledge class I wish I could go back and be their age. although, I don't think they want me to be in their class-- they think Im crazy. literally. one of the girls gave me a sweet thank you note. but the quote on it was "sanity and happiness are an impossible combination" by mark twain. I don't think she was implying I was unhappy.

so now thesis time-- I find out soon about Thailand and if that works out that's increible! if not-- well there's always the parents ;)

I have been remiss.

2009-02-10T22:30:00.000-08:00

I missed my blog's anniversary. but it was my birthday. the anniversary of my blog came secondary to that. -- its weird how much has happened in a year. overall--its a complete delight. I want to travel again. Thailand is becoming a possibility. I have a meeting tomorrow with a professor to talk about logistics...there is still much up in the air...such is the theme of my life. Its an "exciting" time or so I am constantly reminded. But I am just trying to learn what it means to trust God and see where He leads, but mostly I feel Im just kinda throwing things out there and seeing what happens. and you know prayer. lots of it. feel free to join in.

also feel free to join in on these surveys: <http://www.campusfundraiser.com/grouphome/registration.asp?e=101328&es=1114608&m=305452&ms=3359972&r=305452&rs=3359972>

If you take surveys you raise money for KXA. which is a delight. I love KXA this semester, being the pledge trainer has been time consuming and wonderful. It is really weird for me to be the "older" person; Ive always been the youngest of my friends-- so this is a new experience and good. It helps to keep me in the moment rather than too far ahead.

Yes, my title is still a lie-- maybe it will be 21 in Thailand in not too long-- hmm.

So everyone on facebook is writing these 25 fun facts...and now my mind thinks in 25 facts-- I thought of some more so Ill add them here:

1. In junior high, I developed a strange infatuation with the Rock. and loved to do the people's eyebrow and flex my arms-- yea so much for jr. high not being awkward.

2. I used to write angsty poetry in jr. high and high school-- Im thinking there should be a renewal of that.

Well that's all folks--sorry for all the dashes, ellipses, and quotes. but I think my mind does that in place of my expressions that I am making while writing this.

P.S. my birthday was wonderful-- I received a Baylor bobble head bear. delight. and three cakes.

First Week Accomplished.

2009-01-16T17:23:00.000-08:00

I didn't get Teach for America-- so we'll see what's next. I am hoping Thailand and then graduate school.

Aye, ya, yai. For correct pronunciation, ask my mother. She likes to yell that sometimes and I felt it was appropriate for the moment. Anyway my first week has been overall delightful. In my constant whinings about how busy, confused, and stressed I am, I have neglected to mention a few things, namely one thing-- I have a most perfect group of friends. and I am extremely busy this week which is keeping my mind off of my disappointment. Anyway, please pray for me during these decisive times, as well as for my friends who are also dealing with life decisions.

Oh and Hurray for Obama's Inauguration. I still love history even if I might pursue English instead.

Renovations.

2009-01-07T12:43:00.001-08:00

New in the blogging world: Lindsey Walther-- she's essentially trying to one-up me in this blogging endeavor. Don't worry I feel confident that this blog will prevail; however it is time for renovations- I mean it is the New Year now. So I changed my picture and the colors. But, sadly I need to change the name for as you should know it will be a complete lie within about three weeks. That's right, not only will I be posing that I'm still in Europe but also, I will finally be twenty-one. BAM. so what's a good name? thoughts? please comment.

Also, I have discovered that you readers, whoever you are, are rarely checking out my videos. Seriously guys, these links are gems, pearls even. Just click it or ticket. wow. Ive spent a lot of time watching TV over the break, its been awesome.

I now own a nano ipod. thanks 'rents. I am now on a quest to become less music illiterate as well as make up my mind as to what I really like... Im a little like Julia Roberts in "Runaway Bride" minus the bride part or the runaway part, but she never knows what she likes... I just go with whims-- in many areas of life. So I will list a couple of artists that I like, then from that list I need more suggestions.

Artists: Leona Naess, the Killers, Counting Crows, Duffy

Recap-- comment with blog name idea and music. that would be fabbity fab. and Im gonna need those TPS reports

Sound of Music.

2008-12-28T17:25:00.000-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1E_VmUeNkIQ

Please watch this. It combines two of my favorite things-- I feel that very few people will understand how much this clip delights me. embarrassing, but delightful.

I had a good Christmas-- our family Christmas was today. But on real Christmas my dad and I watched six episodes of Knight Rider-- also quite a delight. I adore bad TV. Also, my dear friend Kim texted me and told that someone was MADE into a Soap Star on MTV-- that kid stole my dream, but perhaps there's still hope.

32 days till my 21st birthday! Funny how much I want to grow up, but still cling to John Mayer's Stop this Train.

Ever since I traveled last semester, I'm continuining a list of places where I want to go next...

1) Salzburg (think about the title and clip)
2) Alahambra
3) Taj Mahal
4) Bangkok
5) Irish countryside
6) French countryside

there will be more to come. but I am not, for the record-- a Euro snob. Although, the bulldozer of success does not even read this.

I stayed up till 4:30 last night reading Cold Sassy Tree. finally-- thank goodness I can read for fun now-- next for the thesis! but it will get done.

Love, love.
-CD

Almost there.

2008-12-14T17:45:00.000-08:00

This last week has been one of the hardest weeks of my life-- I guess that's not really saying much. But nevertheless, it was rough. But now I only have two more finals-- one of which involves me pretending to be a medium...so I will survive, hopefully.

I had my Teach for America interview on Wednesday in Dallas. Thankfully, my dad graciously drove me up there-- or else it would have been even more rough. I think it went fairly well, my teaching sample was a little bland. But, I was not. And the personal interview went well, I think. So, we shall see. January 20th. If it's not to be, I won't get it. But I pray it is to be.

Currently, I am incredibly excited that this semester is about to be over. It's been hard- mostly with the Exit Interview, Thesis Chapter, Grad School decisions, TFA, and oh yea- five classes plus SIing. Unfortunately, next semester doesn't look any easier-- I just got elected to be pledge trainer for KXA-- I am pretty excited about it, but I am also doing SING-- so I will be very busy again. This is a really boring update.

My favorite professor thinks I wrote an article that was good enough for publication-- unfortunately it was my English class-- so yeah, maybe I should be pursuing that as a grad school option. But he said I definitely had enough scholarly depth to be in grad school-- thank goodness, this was probably the second time in four years a professor has encouraged me.

I went to four parties this week- I was a sensation at all of them.

Snowboy is currently residing in a basket with lights wrapped around it-- gaudiness runs in the fam around Christmas time.

Here's a cool video post: http://www.adventconspiracy.org/ Its pretty apt for the holiday season--and I liked it a lot, but I would still appreciate presents.

2008-11-29T13:52:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving!

A couple days late-yes, but the spirit of the holidays can keep going... I found my baby tree for my apartment and am looking forward to having a decorating party with myself! If I can possibly finish my thesis. I am on page eleven. I have to have 20 pages by December 1st. I am not really worried about that, but my UT application for grad school needs to be turned in that day also. Hmm, maybe I shouldn't post to the world all my attempts...then all will know when I fail...but I don't really care- I just like to write and receive attention. Four comments on my last blog-Im gaining in popularity.

So Thanksgiving- it was delightful. I brought a friend of mine from French class home with me. His name is Chisom and he is from Nigeria. Since he didn't even know what day Thanksgiving was I offered him my home to see the traditional thanksgiving. Eating. and Football watching. I got to explain the ways of football to him- thankfully, watching my two brothers and cheerleading paid off and I knew how to explain all the nuances of football... and he liked it but thought it was too violent!

Also, Uncle Marty and Cissy came- and Cissy showed me her TOMS- she is very trendy for being almost sixty and quickly becoming one of my favorite aunts. She was extremely excited about the possibility of me doing Teach for America.

Then George my dad's high school friend showed up. He always randomly shows up on Thanksgiving late in the afternoon- and proceeds to harass my dad by telling us stories- I enjoy it thoroughly.

Then, I went home, and Alyssa and I painted canvases and watched Bridget Jones' Diary. It was an excellent day.

Yesterday, I watched Days of our Lives and played Wii. Hopefully this much needed rest has propelled me into successful productivity until Christmas time!

FRIDAY NIGHT.

2008-11-21T18:27:00.000-08:00

Friday night... big plans. Im home. alone. writing a paper. yes, I am that cool. But surprisingly, I think I am okay with that-- learning to reconcile myself as a lifelong scholar is a bit challenging, but still desirable. I mean, I have a lot of work to do. Right now, I should not be blogging. I should be plugging away at applications, or thesis, or at least the paper Im pretending to write.

But, this paper is weird- Im writing a conference paper for Children's literature, but somehow I picked a creepy book- The Changeover: A Supernatural Romance-- If I have children, this will not be on their reading list for AWHILE. Its took dark and slightly sensual for a child to read, although many in my class argued against me, but these same people had problems with From the Mixed Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler... who are these people? lets teach our kids early about sensuality, but goodness don't run away from home to check out a museum.

Funny, how different people think-- Im sure both sides make excellent points.

I hope yalls lives are a little more exciting.

goodness.

2008-11-17T15:14:00.000-08:00

Well a lot has happened since my last update. In fact I found another blog thats sole purpose is to direct somone to a ridiculous blog-- which turns out to be mine. Thanks L. you're the best.

Last weekend, I went to formal. danced my heart out. Then got up early the next morning, and went to Austin. It really enjoyed going to the UT game despite the fact that we got slaughtered. It was a nice break from the monotony of my baylor life. and it kept reminding me about four years ago when dad, mom, and I visited UT when I considered going there, and we walked up and stared at the field. I really liked the campus and am going to apply there for grad school. But thats just one more thing I am doing!

But more importantly, Baylor beat the Aggies. It was a really fun game, but sadly it was my last home game as a student at Baylor! Weird. weird. weird. It's all going by so fast. My mom asked me the other day if I had been stressed the last couple days, I just laughed-- the last couple days? try this entire semester.

I had a phone interview for Teach for America last night. Wasn't stellar. What have I overcome...was the theme of the conversation. hmm. well we'll see I guess, as usual.

VOTING.

2008-11-05T16:33:00.000-08:00

-voting. hmm. well it was not quite as monumental as I thought it would be. I've been stressing about it for about a month or two. a lot. I used to always say I was politically apathetic, but honestly every time I think about politics I always think about them in relation to how history books will write about them. or how they somehow mirror an early election. or how they are a reaction or a cyclical event. I guess Im too much of a history major to be apathetic.

-this is not a political blog. I am twenty. In the grand scheme of things I know quite little-- but I am not saying that as a cop out...that since I am young I can just think anything that either the majority thinks or I can think something just so I will stand out and be different.

-after all that, I must say-- the facebook statuses that I saw last night were quite appalling. For example, many people stated that due to the election they would move to London because of the socialist leanings of Obama- ARE YOU KIDDING ME? England has universal healthcare and high taxes. why would you get annoyed at the election- and move to a more socialist country. be serious. at least pick a less socialist country.

- furthermore, there is such a thing of balance of powers... in one night the President-ELECT will not destroy the country.

-oh well, maybe its good they are less apathetic than me...

-In other news, I highly encourage watching High School Music 3!

P.S. "Remember, remember the fifth of November." If you know what Im referring to- kudos. and comment.

2008-10-27T22:10:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KrZkaj37kA0

I hope that link works. I really like that artist. Last weekend I went to a concert in Dallas with Lindsey and Megan- it was a delightful break from the monotony that is senior year. I was trying to point out the magnifence of the "MAJESTIC" theater. We saw Ray Lamontagne- that's the you tube cite. click it- he's soulful, raspy, and sometimes folksy- like it.

- My mind is consumed constantly with thoughts of the future. what to do? I need to figure out how to do a poll. I want to go to grad school, teach in Thailand, or do teach for America.

I am just going to throw out all these options and then pray really hard that I get one of them and then God gives me direction.

-Last week, I wrote a poem named "Trifling Tiff" about a kitten for my children's lit class- it was sheer brilliance. I then read it aloud to my class and then the next day I performed a monologue. It was quite a theatrical week, which was pleasant.

- Oh while in Dallas at this Mexican Restaurant, when I walked by one of the servers, he told me I could work there. Maybe my vast experience as a server just radiates from my being.

Fall Break Mania!

2008-10-16T21:43:00.000-07:00

My fall break commenced this afternoon at noon. I have Fantastic plans for this weekend- catch up on life. so far, I managed to watch part of Shanghai Noon ( I really missed you, Bryan, and it was not nearly as hilarious as I recalled. hmm.), a lifetime movie about teen marriage, take a nap, watch grey's anatomy, and the office, and have a semi-cook out complete with s'mores. Why are s'mores named that? what's the appostrophe for? I just realized I had no idea! I have done so well today on my break. but I think I just needed a mind break and will start afresh tomorrow. tomorrow, Im studying. I should work at Ninfa's b/c Im broke, but if I do that, I won't get any studying done tomorrow, b/c I will be anticipating work and then the next day I will be tired. trust me, its pathetic but true. oh, I did clean my apt today some. Ill do some more tomorrow...my room is a disaster zone. but I have an awesome map of the world tacked up in my room. its for my project for European Expansion. I get to pretend to be a renaissance seafarer. and the port I sail out of is...PORTO. I love Porto. I miss Porto. ahh, anyway I need to start that project another thing to add to the list. maybe, I will make this blog my list. since I think Im the only person that reads this, depressing. just because Im not in Europe any more. so sad. but this weekend...I will be productive...and maybe watch Days of Our Lives. yes. and the OC. oh how I want to be a TV star...mmm I also need to practice my monologue. its rough. I need talent. and some inches.

EXCESS OF MIRTH

2008-10-07T15:22:00.000-07:00

HOORAY! I passed my exit interview. I was super nervous, but once I started talking- I felt okay. Apparently, I was a little shaky with my explanation of the satire in Gulliver's Travels. But, I think I just wasn't really thinking about the political satires, so I just went another direction. So the director was a little concerned about that, but he asked me some really hard questions about justice in Milton and Augustine's works. And, thats what he writes books about, so I think that if I answered those questions well then I should be pleased! I was definitely shaky on some things, but to be perfectly honest, I rather enjoyed it when it was a text I liked talking about. Anyway, the other two panel members convinced him I was OUTSTANDING-which is the highest rank! Hooray. I feel just like Tom Sawyer after Injun Joe dies and he says, "he felt an abounding sense of relief and security, now, which revealed to him in a degree which he had not fully appreciated before how vast a weight of dread had been lying upon him..." so yea, that's how I feel, except...now for the THESIS.

EXIT INTERVIEW

2008-10-07T10:52:00.000-07:00

In three hours, I will be entering a room with three people, who will be subjecting me to all sorts of questions. Im incredibly nervous. For the past three years, I have been working on this reading list in preparation for this interview. I just have no idea what they will ask me, but I somehow have to speak intelligently for about an hour. Im going to review my notes, and dress up, and pray in the next three hours. Its just so weird that this interview which has been hanging over my head is finally here. Yes, I should be scrambling to make sure I have points about every book, but ultimately I just gotta get through it and PASS. and then I will feel the proverbial weight lifted off my shoulders. at least I hope. Pray, if you read this before five. Five is when its over. I will update my blog either in a torrent of fury or an excess of mirth. We shall see...

Study/Procrastination

2008-09-24T11:10:00.000-07:00

I read this article this morning about Procrastination, which of course I was procrastinating studying French by reading the article! Also, I just skipped class (I probably shouldn't confess this, because I know my parents read this, because my dad likes to tell me what he thought about commenting, but then didn't..hmm) . I mean I am under the weather and all, but sometimes I just get a little overwhelmed and need to de-stress. Ideally, this would involve a pedicure or a massage, but those are a. time-consuming and b. expensive. Thus, I really wish exercise would become my catharsis. It works for others, unfortunately I like to read pointless articles on-line. Or watch the office. Holla! Its coming back tomorrow night. Im pumped.

Anyway this article said there were six types of procrastination and that procrastinators do in fact know how to manage their time. They just choose not to. Or in the famous words of Bartleby, the Scrivener, "I would prefer not to." I have surmised that I am two kinds- a. perfectionist- I procrastinate, b/c I feel that it will not get done perfectly so I avoid it. B. worrier- I worry much more about it than actually doing it.
So therefore, I just need to reorder my mind in order to change theses ways, but isn't that always the case?

Aren't we always supposed to be re-ordering our minds unto the mind of Christ? What does that look like, never thinking about ourselves? what about our responsibilities? just a thought. ponder, if you like.

When did this happen?

2008-09-20T10:17:00.000-07:00

There's an amazing line in one of my favorite movies, "Juno" The girl comes home and her dad asks her what she's been up to and she responds, "Dealing with things way beyond my maturity level." and that is exactly how I feel. The other day in the car I just looked over at my roommate and said, what about me is an adult? why am I suddenly being an adult. Sure, I moved out of my house at seventeen but only into the dorms. and yea, I traveled around Europe without adults, but Im still a child. I'd rather be making up dance routines or doing skits at slumber parties.

(Although, I still do skits, just now its for a grade in my acting class.) By the way, I am not going to be a soap opera star. I have almost no natural talent, and apparently my face is over-animated. I mean, I probably knew all this before this class, but it just reconfirmed it!

Furthermore, I am really shy. I know no one believes me, but I am. I just get nervous around new people. Anyway, I need to go do some more homework...decide if I need to take the GRE again and study for my Exit Interview... good luck to me and to you whose life is probably as busy as mine you just don't have a blog to whine about it!

2008-09-13T09:30:00.000-07:00

I don't even know what to title this- I think it may just come out of my fingers like some random coalition of thoughts, here goes:

-This last week I spent five nights at the library for about three to four hours every night. (and I still didn't get all my work done for my classes, and somehow my GRE scores are going down).

-Im taking the GRE on Tuesday and I have a nervous knot in my stomach for the last week and a half, but I don't think that's just GRE related.

- I spent Friday night watching a movie with friends and frantically researched grad schools, only to discover-I should probably have a specific area of interest in history!

-I have been telling people for over a year that Im interested in "Cultural History" just to see if they would be enough impressed to quit asking me what I really wanted to study.

-I don't know, the problem is- Im not super strong in languages, especially not European languages, such as French. and I've recently discovered my love for US history as of this semester...but I love Spanish! so Latin America? oh yea, that's right, that's what Im working on for my thesis-

-Yes, currently, Im trying to study for the GRE, write a Thesis, and pass an Exit interview that if I fail, I don't graduate. and Ace my classes. French, U.S. History since 1920, European Expansionism, Children's Literature, and Acting for Non-majors, have I mentioned I adore school? I just don't want to do everything else!

-Also, Im doing SI this year, which stands for supplemental instruction, so I make handouts and quizzes and lead study sessions for a religion class, and although I haven't had much success, I do know I want to be a professor- I really like being an SI, Im just not sure Im ready to commit to a five year PhD program...

-so maybe Thailand? and defer grad school? Please pray for these things and diligence to get everything done. I should probably stop writing and go study. I need to study all day and then go to a bake-off party- I also love my friends and their themed parties!

2008-08-29T12:20:00.000-07:00

I wrote that last post several days ago in the morning, but I didn't post it because it seemed kind of dismal. and Im so not a dismal person. In fact, Im an otter. fun-loving! I am obsessed with personality tests...maybe because Im obsessed with myself a bit. But I just find it so exciting to see what kind of personality I am...I am always all over the board and rarely stay the same. For example, my high school persona was definitely a lion/beaver (leader and extremely driven). My number one strength when I came to Baylor- COMPETITION.... that seems so foreign to me now. Although I must admit, being in class with several people I know...the competitive spirit still thrives despite my best attempts to squash it. I made a 3 on my first journal entry for Children's Lit...four being the highest...and I was devastated for a couple hours. Don't worry, next time I made a four and mine was one of the three that he printed for class, even though we didn't have time to discuss it. Ah, frustaration- I don't like being competitive... it just happens. I don't like being so fun-loving...I wish I was more driven and serious and studious...and well I guess boring. But Im just too fun. I waste time laughing at dumb things or dancing or just endlessly discussing...and I have too good a sense of humor. People laugh AT me not with me....but thats okay because I still love attention and right now classes are good...Ill say more about that later... Oh here's classic pics of my roommate Molly and I on our last first day of college! weird. I was trying to look scholarly by the blackboard. Molly wanted to show off how tall she was compared to the chair...

How did this happen?

2008-08-27T06:13:00.001-07:00

SENIOR YEAR- every moment there's something else to be doing, to be accomplishing, to be preparing for, to occupy every moment of your thoughts. Each day is some new "last." Some thing we are supposed to be cherishing... and now we are the oldest on campus. I don't love that. I've always been the youngest. Im the youngest of my family, the youngest at work, the youngest in my circle of friends, the youngest in the class... and I like it that way. (Minus the annoying fact that everyone is twenty-one but me). So how am I suddenly preparing for my FUTURE life. what does that mean? what do you want to do? what are all these questions leading me to? Is it one thing Im supposed to have a desire for?

And aside from all that, Im happy now. As John Mayer says, Im so good at being young why would I want to get old? I like being on campus, studying at the library, running into random people, expanding my circle of friends, reuniting after semesters abroad, and going to silly parties, having tv dates for crap things like gossip girl, why would I want to leave this? BOO grad school and making new friends. But then again, there is that gut feeling, what else is out there? what new adventure is going to be next? who else is out there that I can be friends with? this Baylor bubble suits me... but maybe, just maybe there is better out there...that's the optimism coming out.

Because I must. I slightly hate these.

2008-08-19T23:03:00.000-07:00

The Rules: Answer the questions using only one word. Then tag three others.
1. Where is your cell phone? Nearby.
2. Your significant other? Non-existent.
3. Your hair? Dirty
4. Your mother? Eccentric.
5. Your father? Padre.
6. Your favorite thing? Friends.
7. Your dream last night? Non-existent.
8 Your favorite drink? Diet coke
9. Your dream/goal? Soapstar
10. The room you’re in? muggy
11. Your hobby? Surviving.
12. Your fear? Emptiness.
13. What do you want to be in 6 years? Professor
14. What you’re not? tall
15. Muffins? Banananut
16. One of your wish list items? Planeticket.
17. Where you grew up? Waco.
18. The last thing you did? Shop
19. What are you wearing? shorts
20. Favorite gadget? laptop
21. Your pets? Angoraziggamousewich
22. Your computer? damaged
23. Your mood? nervous
24. Missing someone? Never.
25. Your car? Surviving…
26. Something you’re not wearing? Make-up.
27. Favorite store? Target
28. Like someone? Myself?
29. Your favorite color? Black.
30. When is the last time you laughed? Momentarily
31. Last time you cried? Wednesday

And now for the tagging...
Bob-because you are my only faithful commenter!
Alyssa-because I want you to update!
Claire-because I love your positivity in your answers!

Parents.

2008-08-18T11:49:00.001-07:00

I watched Dan in Real Life last night. I thoroughly enjoyed it as it wasn't Steve's typical movie (yes, we are on a first name basis). Its also all about parenting and for the last couple weeks Ive just been thinking about the differences among my friends' parents.

Disclaimer: I adore my parents and of course believe they made all the right decisions with me since I turned out so lovely.

But I just think its funny what parents choose to be strict about. For example, my parents let me watch Seinfeld beginning at the age of nine and its still my fave sitcom. But for some reason, I was not allowed to watch the Simpsons. I was allowed to watch a rated R movie at about ten...I think it was "The Ghost and the Darkness" but "Little Mermaid" was off limits. Apparently, real and violent lions are better than a cartoon creepy witch. After now watching "little Mermaid" I completely agree. Ursula is creepy and those little pod people are certainly scarier than the idea of Val Kilmer being mauled to death by a lion!
Also, some of my friends were not spanked and they turned out wonderfully, but it just surprises me!
Yesterday while celebrating Bryan's 23rd birthday, we started talking about "The Hickory". The Hickory is the name affectionately given to the wooden paddle that was used (rather frequently) on us kids. I feel my dad had a little too much fun bringing it out and showing Delana who I think thought we were slightly sadistic. For the record, I will probably spank my kids. It seems effective and I was spanked a lot as a child- and probably deserved it. Bryan was for sure spanked the most and he's a missionary! Shoutout to him and his wife Delana who will be moving to Mexico shortly. I will certainly miss seeing them every week!

Anyway, I just wanted to share some random thoughts about parenting. Don't worry Im not thinking about being a parent any time soon or even maybe never...

A feeling of Elation.

2008-08-11T15:21:00.001-07:00

Mmm. I just walked out of my final day of scheduled Ninfa's work...at least for now! I feel fantastic...almost like a weight has been lifted from my entire body. I am now sitting in the dark listening to music and hearing the rain pour down. Have I ever mentioned that I LOVE rain? I feel like it symbolically washed Ninfa's off of me...well, Ill be back this weekend to pick up for other people. But at least it will be of my own decision.

Oh yea, back to rain... I love it! I was made fun of all last semester because I never had a hood or an umbrella and I always looked like a bedraggled rat! Or a hood rat, if you will. I like that song where that girl says she is some guys "hood thing" like from the hood. what does that mean? I like it.

Oh also, I don't think yall are getting the importance of being off the schedule at Ninfa's. This is monumental. I have worked there for four years and anyone that knows me well, knows Ninfa's is the source of almost all my anger. I mean, its very possible I will find something else in my life to take my frustaration out on ...but still. And I mean as soon as I got home I started stressing over money, should I take out more loans? how am I going to live with this severe pay decrease, how useful is my new credit card, what if I need to visit grad schools, oh wait, what if I choose to not go to grad school and live in another country, will I have money to see my fam every once in awhile, can I go to NY and visit my sister, will I need a car...etc. etc. etc. but you know what it will work out and in the meantime--
Im lying in bed and wearing my favorite red dress and jamming out.

Delusions of Grandeur.

2008-07-30T22:16:00.000-07:00

A teacher friend of my mom's once referred to their student as having "delusions of grandeur" in reference to their intelligence. My mom and I laughed a lot about that, but years later- it still rings in my head. DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR. I can't help but wonder if I have delusions of grandeur. Its a little thing called self-doubt, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. In fact, I should completely doubt my self knowing that I need to completely rely on God... easier said than done. much easier said than done.

So what are my delusions of grandeur? well, at least I don't really know of any yet. which means I could just be completely delusional or disassociated from reality- also a very common dilemma.

I don't really have a point. Its just a thought. Do delusions of grandeur exist? Can we shoot too high? Can we be too idealistic?

Or, in an effort to hide the fact that we might fail, do we stray from doing our best, from even having delusions of grandeur?

I once told a teacher that I couldn't start the assignment on time because then I would have too much time to complete it. And if I knew I had the time, I would spend too much time working on it. But, if I procrastinated, I could just whip it out.... this actually tends to be a common theme. I don't like to start studying early or writing early b/c then I have too much time to waste. But if I intentionally waste time up until the last possible moment. Those moments are precious. Its illogical, yes. However, I think its a prevalent problem for pseudo-perfectionists. I procrastinate most things because Im too afraid to start them...

-I dont like to put photos in photo albums-in case at some point I want to change the order or add another photo.
- I cannot successfully decorate, b/c I get too nervous I won't like it...so I just stop.
-I don't clean my room often, because I know I won't be satisfied with the entire organization.
-I refuse to organize things b/c I never finish it.
What does this mean? Im a perfectionist, but backwards?

I once asked my sister what was my worst quality for an application. she said I was slightly OCD. my roommate said I could be a little more OCD.... Both were right.

Tiaras are Underrated.

2008-07-13T16:33:00.000-07:00

Since the tender age of eight, I have owned a large, sparkly tiara. It was randomly given to me... no, I was not a self-centered beauty queen- I was just a self-centered child; I didn't actually win anything for it. Sometimes, those things even garner scholarships...I was not so lucky. Maybe I would have at the age of four... I was adorable. I totally peaked at that age. Its true. My older brother and I both agree on this point. We were gorgeous children.

On to the point, since this age I have at random points during the years brought out my tiara from its place of retirement and paraded about the house-for no apparent reason, much to the chagrin of my parents, who wonder about my sanity. But, trust me, its a good idea. You instantly feel better, special, and you hold your head up higher, probably because you have to in order for the tiara not to fall off. I highly recommend it...you also feel taller... which is always good in my case. Im a mere five three but with the crown...I think Im the tallest person in the room, I mean, it is rather large-I would say three inches high. But its just the...feeling....the moment...you think you've won something...but no, you are just you-in a tiara.

Yes, I am a self-induglent youngest child. You should try it.

Best Sibling Ever.

2008-07-07T11:46:00.000-07:00

Yes, I realize that I have not posted in about three weeks. However, in my defense, I was without my computer for a week and a half....a reeeallllyyy longgggg week and a half. That time frame just happened to coincide with my roommate leaving for camp and Calvin taking back his beautiful TV. I had been babysitting it for about a month. I know, Im a really caring, and giving friend. Even devoid of those three things, I still managed to waste massive amounts of time. I have no idea how. There was absolutely nothing in my apt. I think I just stared at the piles of books I need to be reading/studying. Sometimes I just sit there and contemplate how much work I need to be doing....therefore, not really getting anything done. Its really a skill I have at never being bored enough to do work.

Also, I somehow managed to not work for a week. So, Im now broke. but at least I have my computer. to let you kiddos now about my FAM weekend. I took off all weekend from work in order to solidify my place as the favorite sibling. It went pretty well.

I gave rides to the four oldest home from the bar. (Im also a really good citizen as well. and twenty.) and got all the kids discounts on their Ninfa's food. they really have no idea how much they all adore me. and I let them borrow my poker set. Unfortunately, there were a pair of handcuffs in there. Its a long story. They were a joke gift and somehow where randomly placed in there...

all in all...weekend with the fam = success. weekend without work= HUGE SUCCESS, minus the broke part. we'll see about that.

Highlight or Lowlights of my Weekend-you decide.

2008-06-16T09:30:00.000-07:00

1- Practicing becoming the world's best wheel while traveling to Dallas with Kristen and her bf!

2- Getting the biggest M's on my hands of my life to signify I was a minor when we went dancing, which made me feel like a cow ready for slaughter. (I then flipped them upside down and made it look like I was saying WOW...Im pretty sure that convinced the bouncer that I was mature beyond my years.)

3-Getting asked to dance by a couple older guys...which I then managed to pawn off on Faith, by assuring him I didn't want to dance but SHE certainly did!

4- Getting triple striped tan lines while pretending to be sporty while watching Kristen wakeboard on Saturday.

5-Realizing I was the fifth wheel until a cute baseball coach, late twenties joined us. Unfortunately I couldn't completely wipe off the M's and so his first comment to me was, "ahh minor." and there went all my flirting capabilities. (assuming I had some.)

6-Next working an AWFUL eight and a half hour shift and realizing I was still a dollar short to pay my dad back for my car repair. unless I used my random gold dollar.

7- Getting to boss around fifteen eight-yr. old girls and tell them to drink their sodas slowly because their parents let them sit by themselves!

8- Church, Sunday lunch with my fam. getting teased about my nose ring and nerdom as per usual.

9- Using Calvin's TV as much as possible, watching Atonement and then three hours of Grey's Anatomy pretending there isn't massive amounts of studying and reading looming over my head!

10- Potluck sunday dinner with my friends where I brought break and bake cookies. and realizing sometimes Molly and I are excellent entertainers so we shouldn't shy away from it!

I feel better already.

2008-06-11T12:52:00.000-07:00

Penelope Watch This.

Summer Doldrums.

2008-06-11T12:28:00.000-07:00

Basically. I hate summer. I know, I know, only pale, nerdy kids hate summer...oh wait, that's me. But in this case, its because Im not enjoying my full vacay time. Instead, I get up, I read, and then I go to work. Socialization occurs after work for about an hour...while I struggle for something interesting to say to other people. Because the only thoughts in my head consist of me constantly wondering, "what the heck am I doing with my life?" and no one actually cares/ wants to hear about it b/c that's what they are wondering. so sometimes the only conversations I have consist of me droning on about my "endless" possibilities. and then the other person is droning on about THEIR possibilities. Its incredibly inconsiderate if you ask me. but that's humanity for you. and then sometimes I just think whats the point of all these friendships they are just gonna leave in a year anyway. but, Im a pursuer of friendships. its what I do. but Im not actually sure why. maybe its because I desperately want to have something to say other than, "would you like charro or refried beans with that?"

and yes, I realize this is a boring, pessimistic post. but its all Ive got right now. I think Ill go watch some SNL videos and cheer up.

The Problem with Blogging.

2008-06-05T09:05:00.000-07:00

-Since blogging is my new found hobby, it is imminent that I discuss its downfalls before I become too much of an intense "blogger." Already its a bit pathetic that I keep up with my siblings via blogging. Speaking of siblings, Leah kind of already talked about this on one of her recent blogs. But, I swear I have been thinking about it...pretty much since my last post. It takes me awhile to actually blog.
Im still extremeley hesitant for two reasons:
-anyone could be reading this blog. ANYONE. I could have people become obsessed with me as a person (I mean more people than already exist in everyday life!)
-also, as this is an online journal Im supposed to be sharing my inmost thoughts...but these of course must be censored for the general public because it would be awkward for everyone to know my hopes, dreams, fears, aspirations, heartbreaks, etc.
Therefore, why am I really writing this? Its quite a conundrum...however, my dad so lovingly told me that I never say anything important. so I guess its really okay.

In other news:
-I have a nose ring, who knew I was so edgy.
-Im an official trainer at Ninfa's (I have so much more power...I get to grade tests...its really too intense for me...so much power goes to my head.)
- All my managers are trying to set me up with all the new people...would that be considered harassment? of course, my mom also tried to get me to flirt with the starbucks barista the other day. really if people had it their way I think my blog should now be not "20 in Europe" but "20 and on the prowl" thoughts?

Eating Alone.

2008-05-21T17:17:00.000-07:00

Ive eaten alone today, twice. For those of you that know me, this never happens...I eat out all the time or at work or at least with my roommate. But its summer time, and things are slow and Im desperately trying to eat at home. But as I sat at my counter top all by myself staring at the window...I contemplated. I dont like eating in front of the TV or while reading ...I can't do it. So I sat and ate and thought. This is going to be my life in grad school. Yep, in one year Im starting all over. I love people, specifically my friends. I am what some people call a "social addict". I don't really want to have to start this process over with a bunch of grad school nerds. across the country, completely alone. Sure, I can go to Europe when I have thirty people from Baylor with me. But, can I do this? I mean, I can, I will, and Im excited. Its just kind of weird to know that in one year Ill be leaving Baylor, Ninfa's, and home. I mean my experience at Baylor has been completely different than my high school experience. and I never for a moment was homesick in Europe. but, I just dont know if Im ready to commit myself for a doctoral program right away. so what am I gonna do?

22 Days.

2008-05-20T09:37:00.000-07:00

It has been twenty-two days for me back in the States, and I have lost all the resolutions that I brought back from Europe. Supposedly, it takes twenty-one days to make a habit...I have failed.
My resolutions included things such as:
-walk everywhere possible (Texas sun eliminated this immediately.
-use my Dublin bag when grocery shopping in order to save the environment ( I actually havent really been to the grocery store for real yet...which leads me to my next failed resolution)
- Only eat out occasionally. (clearly its been three weeks and I haven't really eaten at home-its pathetic).
-Cut down on my cell phone use... It was really nice not to be attached to one for three months...but Im obsessively social to a fault so this one fell by the wayside.
- Oh and I wanted more people to call me CD like some of my European friends and my sister...Ive learned that people dont take kindly to being called something new. I learned this when Robert became Bob, by the way, Bob, you will never be Robert to me any more!
-Become more artsy...really who was I kidding? I just don't have what it takes to be cutesy...I realized this immediately when I moved out for the semester, within one day Kaitlyn had transformed my room into cute, homey, comfortable, neat...and then I moved back again and it became sparse, desolate, messy, and unused. This homemaker thing is just not in the cards for me...so here are my new resolutions... completely unattainable but at least more like me:

-Finish reading list before August.
-Complete Thesis Proposal and most research.
-Study and ACE the GRE.

Ill keep you posted.
-CD